Fragile - A Bucky Barnes Story

I love you

It was around 5am when I first woke up. Hap followed me to the window, standing quietly as I stared out at the compound landscape in the early morning dawn. I stood there, stuck in a cycle of wayward thoughts as I looked off and stare at nothing in particular and then a small whine pulled me from my troubled thoughts. I glance down at Hap and nod for him to follow me.

I fill his bowl of water and wait for him to get his fill before I take the leash off the hook by the door where Sam must have put it and we head out of the room to go walk around the compound grounds.

The walk was pleasant, the crisp night air hung with dew but the silence was enough to filter through many thoughts I'd refused to address. Firstly, could I forgive Bucky for what he did and secondly, should I stay any longer or leave like he did me.

I couldn't be that cruel though.

I glance out at the expansive lawn and smile seeing Hap hopping around a frog that was trying its hardest to get away from the large goofball that thought it was a toy. I stood there for a few minutes, arms crossed over my chest.

And then I heard gravel crunching as heavy footsteps brought a stranger to my side.

"Why are you awake?" Bucky's timid voice cut through the silence of the early morning like a blade.

I tensed but I knew it was him, I had memorized his gait long ago and felt the familiar pulse of his wired mind.

"Woke up early, why are you awake?" my voice was monotonous as my eyes never left Hap playing in the tall monkey grass around a flower bed.

"I never went to sleep," he answered and then let out a sigh. "You have every right to be mad at me, Lucky."

"Yes I do," I answered with a darker tone, starting to get more aggravated with his stupid words. I refused to look at his stupid handsome face so that I could hold onto the anger that fueled my indifference.

"I thought if I cleared my conscience, I might be enough for you," I glanced over at his words, against my own wishes. He stood with his hands shoved in his black jean pockets. His gaze on the lawn before him, his eyes unmoving. "If I did something on my own to fix my head, you wouldn't think I was codependent and relying on false feelings like you said."

"Are you fucking stupid?" my face betrayed the anger that bubbled to the surface. His face displayed shock at either my curse word or my raised voice. "If you would have waited for me to wake the hell up out of a coma, I would have told you it didn't matter because I seen that you loved me, and I love you, you fucking idiot!"

He didn't stop me when I pounced at him, throwing wild punches at his hard chest. He easily caught my wrist after a couple contacts.

"I'm a fucking idiot," he repeated my words, his lips pulling back to reveal a breathtaking smile. "You loved me this whole time."

"Yeah, you fucking dick," I sighed, resigned to the fight. He pulled my wrist into his chest and laid my hands against his black zip up jacket.

"I'm so sorry, Lucky," he whispered as his hands slid off my wrist and hesitantly went behind me, wrapping around my waist to pull me into an embrace that warmed me instantly. "I can't take it back, but I'll make up for it, I promise you. I won't ever leave you again, if you'll let me."

"I'm still mad at you," I murmured against the cotton material of his jacket.

"You have every right to be," he responded, his hands rubbing up and down my back in a comforting motion.

"I should let my dog rip your arm off and bury it in the yard," I grumbled as I turned my face into the material and allowed the unshed tears that had built in my eyes to fall and leave wet spots.

"I would gladly take that punishment but I'd like to keep my arm for the moment, so I can hold you," he murmured as he laid his head on top of mine, his lips kissed atop my head a few times.

"I missed you so much," I couldn't hold the anger anymore, the unshed tears now turned into a waterfall against his jacket. He squeezed me tighter to him as the ugly tears and noises escaped me as I unleashed all my emotions.

"I wanted to turn around and come back to you the minute I left," he admitted, one of his hands sliding up my back to cradle the back of my neck. "I missed you so much, Dove."

"It's super unhealthy but I'll probably never let you live this down as long as I live," I hiccuped as I leaned back and stared up at his worn face, worn from emotions and trauma that he had recently gone through.

Bucky's jaw clenched as he thought, his hand slid to my jaw as he looked into my eyes. "I'll spend every minute of every day making it up to you."

"Good," I whispered, looking between his lips and his eyes. I shook off the warning bells in my head saying I shouldn't forgive him so easily, fuck the warning bells.

I slid my hands upwards until my arms wrapped around his neck, gently tugging him downwards until I could reach his plump lips with my own.

I gasped into the kiss at the instant connection, his brain pulse hit my own with a bang similar to fireworks. A bond, a connection, proof that he loved me and I loved him.

He pulled my hips until he met mine and our heads tilted to deepen the kiss. His fingers dug into my hips and a growl resounded in his throat. We only pulled away when the need of oxygen overtook the need for each other.

He pressed his forehead against mine and closed his eyes tightly. "I love you so much."

"I love you too Buck," I sigh, closing my eyes.