I Solemnly Swear james potter x reader

The past

Y/n made her way out past James towards the open window to the roof where she knew her brother was. She hesitant to step out as she looked towards the hunch werewolf.
"Hey Rem" she whispered as she finally plucked up the courage to sit next to him.
He looked up in acknowledgment, he didn't have to pretend around her, so he didn't. She watched as he continued to to take long drag from the perfectly rolled joint he had placed between his figures.

"This is something you've been hiding from me" she joked raising a eyebrow,
He looked a smirk on his face "do you disprove, dear sister"

"No"

"Lier"

"Hey!" She exclaimed "fine......what does it feel like to you know, be high"
He gave a coy smile, then looked down towards the ground, "its relaxing, peaceful almost, plus it dulls the pains"

She gave a sympathetic look, he glanced back to the half smoked joint , "can i"

"WHAt, know y/n im not going to be the cause of you getting on weed"

"That's not fair, if you can smoke it i can"

"NO"

she huffed "fine"
But a small smile grew on her face.

They sat there for a while, staring out over the grounds watching the whomping willow swing at unsuspecting birds.
Then remus broke the silence
"I know why you here y/n"
"What, what do you mean can i really not just want to sit and watch my brother smoke" she smiled
"Y/n"
"Fine,fine,fine"
"I.."
"I'm sorry" he interrupted
"What"
"I'm sorry, i shouldn't have told them that way, and other people heard and it was our story to tell together and im sorry"
"Rem"
"No, i was was stupid and i shouldn't of said shit y/n, now people are going to think im this psycho murder, and well a guess there not wrong but.. i dont want you to be tied into it too."
He paused taking a long drag
"And i know how hard it is for you, how much mum passing effected you and I've gone and brought all those feeling back up"

"Remus listen to me"

"NO, let me finish" he hissed, she backed down
"I don't know what i can do to make it better, but if there is anything name it, i will leave school if you want i will, will ..anything y/n please" he was getting slightly hysterical now.
So y/n grabbed both of his hand in her own and turned him towards her.
"Look at me, your not to blame, for any of it, i dont blame you for yesterday and i dont blame you for the accident, it wasn't your fault"
He sighed "but you should" and pulled away
"Yeah i feel sad mum died and yeah it fucking sucks, but she was your mum to, you can't keep trying to protect me from things that have happened to you too"
"Out of the two of us you were the one there, you were the one that... that saw her.."

"That killed her" he muttered

"You deserve to Mourn to"

He looked at her for a second then burst into tears.
"Let it out" she whispered as she held him in her arms

She had never really seen him mourn for there mother, day after the incident, it was like he just shut himself off to emotions he was numb, h would comfort y/n all through the night, but never once would he let himself think, mourn stop.
This was good she tried to convince herself. He needs this.

She sill remember the evening she returned, her mothers body had been taken, and when she arrived Remus and her father were sat in silence in the living room. She remembered looking toward Remus but him refusing to meet her eye, he was still covered in blood from the previous night and had a long gash right across his torso, no one had helped him.
After she walked in her father brought her to his study where the truth behind the incident was told very slowly to her, she had been crying when she entered but when she left that room she was inconsolable.

The call she had received at Leah's said she had died in a tragic car crash and with her mum being a muggle she had believed it the truth made it so much worse. She guiltily remembered how angry she was with Remus as she stepped out of the study, but that quickly disappeared when she took a better look at his condition. He was as pale as a sheet, big black under eye bags and the Gash looked very nasty. She knew her father was clearly refusing to help him so she stepped in.

She remembered as she approached him he flinched away, not meeting her eye. "Let me help" she whispered and lead him to his room where she sat him down on the bed and told him she was getting a glass of water. In this she dropped some sleeping draught cause she knew he wouldn't take some by himself and when he passed out she started work at healing.
The next couple of days where hell aouras in and out checking the building, watching over Remus 24/7 it took a week for them to persuade them they where fine and to they finally left.
The rest of the holiday was horrible, the day before school went back remus had put this whole new face on, he was clearly trying to help y/n get ready, and was taking charge as there dad was never there. Slowly thing started to get a new routine.

It was the worst summer of her life however and she wont ever forget, but for now her time to be looked after was over, her brother needed her more.

Again sorry this isn't the best, wanted to add some more background Also sorry for spelling mistakes xoxo