For when it's dark

When you trust people, you get disappointed.

People never last in your life. They're never constant, they always change.

God never changes, he never disappoints. He put you on this earth to test you. Give God your unwithering, undying faith and he'll give you eternity.

Love God. Love the good and bad of this world for with all good comes trials and with all bad comes tests; both from God to gauge our faith.

My trust for some people left me dumbfounded at things they ended up saying, things laced with malice. My love for some people left me broken when they'd make quips about me and my life. My friendships left me hurt. People in your life are tests from God.

Seek not lest you are sought when it comes to certain testing, dark and difficult people.

Don't expect anything from anyone. No one owes you anything, no one besides yourself. You owe you.

You owe yourself to search for meaning with everything that happens in your life. Search for meaning when life seems meaningless. Nothing is futile; God puts us in every moment for a reason. Find that reason, tread wisely, and know that God is aware.

You owe yourself to be happy and content. Life can be, and probably will be, worse. God tests us. He didn't put us on this world for nothing; we are here for his worship. Smile even when you're numb inside, smile till the numb subsides.

You owe yourself to be at peace. Find your center and hold; God should be your center: God is a center that will never fail you. Make prayer a time of peace. Don't pray angry. Don't pray rashly. Don't pray forcefully. Pray peacefully. Relax. Mean it. Use your prayer to thank god, to truly thank god for every little thing in your life. The good and the bad. Thank god for the alcoholic mother, because through her you learn what not to do, you learn how to not be, you learn what weakness is and you learn to ask God for strength, for the both of you. Through her you learn to love those whose hearts have hardened, you learn sympathy and the power of loss when it isn't accepted. Thank god for the overbearing older brother and grandfather, because through them you learn how to love, how to care and how to always be there for those who don't even realize they need you. Thank god for the annoying twin sister, because through her you learn patience, you learn happiness and you learn to break free on occasion and just enjoy simple, stupid, annoying moments, you learn to breath. Thank god for your older sisters because through them you learn that life's too short to sweat the little things. Thank god for your exstepdad and stepbrother because through them you realize that strength is what u make of it, you realize love doesn't end when families family ties end. You realize that people who truly love you will never regret a moment spent with you, and will look to make more memories even when the end of their line has come.

Thank god for every little thing in your life. The good, the bad, the painfully sad. Thank him for the physical stuff, your body, your health, your mind, your soul and the ability to feel, the ability to be, the ability to cry.

Always reach out. Don't be the one to avoid and disregard. Always be kind, even when it hurts. Always be giving, even when you have nothing left. The best free thing you can give to a person is a smile, a smile can make a random persons dark day lighten up. Your smile might just strengthen their faith and save their life.

Always breath. Times may be testing but never stop breathing. Never get fed up. Never give up. Find a happy space in your mind, even when it seems nearly impossible, and curl up in that happy space, and breath. Breath. Breath. Breath.

Believe. Always believe. Even when faith hurts, believe. God wants us all in heaven for eternity, he wants us close. Remember that life is nothing compared to eternity. Nothing. It's a fraction of a millisecond, if that. Remember. Please, just remember that. It's easier in heaven; you'll find all that you've lost, your mind not withstanding.