That time Louis went speed dating

This one's for you LouisThiccSexyAss ♥️

At the age of 27, he was always the odd man out at every dinner party. That one single guy with loads of gay couples telling him that he wasn't getting any younger and he needed to find his significant one soon. Assholes! As if he didn't already know that.

He didn't even know why he kept going to these dinners. He had a lot of friends and they always invited him to their wine and brie parties and it felt rude to decline. It seemed like they needed him there for some reason.

He was always the center of their attention and he would lie if he said that he didn't like that, but lately it had become quite tiring. It was always the same questions. How was the market nowadays? He told them some story about a bad dating experience or one-night stand and they all laughed and told him how happy they were that they didn't have to go through that again.

Louis figured they were jealous. He had eyes and ears. He knew most of them only had sex like once a month. That they argued about household chores and didn't get any sleep because of the kids. Louis always said that he was glad to be single but that wasn't entirely true. He was jealous of what they had.

Sure, he enjoyed casual sex but a nagging feeling told him that sex could be so much better if you had it with someone you loved and trusted. You could explore boundaries, get to know what made your partner tick. One time things didn't really give him that opportunity.

And then there was the being lonely part. That kind of sucked! No one missed him and got happy when he came home after work. Maybe he should get a dog?

His best friends Liam and Zayn were having a dinner party this time. He was seated at the short end of the table as usual.
"So Louis, do men still send dickpics around? It's so tacky." Martin, one of Liam's coworkers asked.

Louis looked up from his plate just to find everyone staring at him.
"Everyone enjoys mine but I have an exceptional dick." Louis joked dryly.

They stared at him in shock.
"He's joking!" Zayn giggled.

The other couples didn't look like they believed him. Louis rolled his eyes.
"Oh, for fucks sake, it was a joke."

It was pretty much downhill from there. Louis stayed and helped Zayn and Liam clear the table after the guests had left.
"I don't get it. You're both fun, lovely people. Why do you hang out with those couples?" Louis asked. He wasn't as much of a help but at least he was excellent company.

"Well, you know how it is." Liam shrugged.

Louis pointed a carrot stick at him before he took a bite.
"No, I don't know, and I don't think I want to find out either. Why do couples have to be so fucking dull? Ehm, not you two obviously."

"Thanks, mate." Liam snorted but he smiled.

"It was a compliment! I wouldn't mind having what you two have. Then we could have awesome couples dinners all the time!" Louis sighed.

"Oh! Oh! I totally forgot to tell you." Zayn said excitedly.

"Tell me what?" Louis asked and glared at him suspiciously. Zayn never had any good ideas.

"Just hear me out." Zayn grinned. He came and stood opposite Louis who was sitting on the kitchen counter. Zayn raised his arm and swayed his hand, palm up against the ceiling like he was painting a rainbow or announcing a headline.
"Speed dating!"

Louis choked on his carrot which was fucking hilarious since he didn't exactly have gag reflexes.
"No! Absolutely not!"

"Yes, yes, yes! My friend Dirk is holding a gay speed dating event next Saturday. I've already signed you up." Zayn smirked.