For those of you that know, this is my daughter, Madi.
For those of that don’t know, this is my daughter, Madi.
For those of you that know, you know.
For those of you that don’t know, she is an addict.
I have been on this journey with her since she was 14 years old. She will celebrate her 20th birthday in 37 days. Which is ironic because I was 20 when I had her. We are 6 years and 3 rehabs in. Read on.
Did you know that addiction is classified in the DSM-5? It’s a mental illness that lives in the brain stem: the same brain stem that serves a critical role in regulating certain involuntary actions of the body, including heartbeat and breathing. Pause on that. Addicts feel that they need their drug of choice (DOC) the same way they feel they need to breathe. Pause on that.
Did you know that our society treats addiction as a moral issue and pawns it off on law enforcement to “control”? The average stay in jail is 14 days or less. Where addicts are left to detox alone…outside of medical supervision.
Did you know the detox process can be violent and result in death if not monitored by medical professionals?
The addict is then released at the time their serotonin levels are at their lowest, leading to a high rate of relapse. It’s a pun to say this is criminal. It takes an average of 14-16 months of sobriety for an addict’s brain to balance serotonin levels to that of a neuro-typical brain. Did you know that? Did you know that most insurances will only pay for <30 days of treatment for an addict? Please get mad about that. I’m begging you. Because treatment is tens of thousands of dollars. And please re-read all of that with “Missy’s daughter” in lieu of “the addict” and then decide how you feel about it.
Did you know that 136 people die everyday from opioid overdose? That’s one person every 10.58 minutes. By the time you’re done reading and processing this post, someone will have died from an opioid overdose. Someone’s child. Someone’s spouse. Someone’s parent. Someone’s friend. Someone’s aunt/uncle. Let that sink in.
Did you know that the two biggest factors that “make” an addict are (1) Genetic Predisposition and (2) Childhood trauma. There’s not that “one hit” or that “one decision” that will make an addict and addict. It’s NOT a moral problem. I repeat, addiction is NOT A MORAL PROBLEM.
Did you know that the BRCA gene for breast cancer has a 5-10% genetic predisposition rate? And people undergo testing and life changing surgeries to avoid it. Addiction’s genetic predisposition is over 50%.
O V E R 5 0 %. Let that sink in. You still think addiction is a moral problem? A parenting problem? Please hear me screaming at the tops of my lungs for my daughter, Madi. Who has brown hair and hazel eyes. A personality that will light up every room and a brain as brilliant as anyone I’ve ever met.
If there’s one thing an addict would say….it’s that they’re still in there. (I know because I’ve asked.) The person that you knew and loved is still in there. They are not their disease. THEY ARE NOT THEIR DISEASE. Addiction is a disease. Much like diabetes. It has to be monitored everyday. For the rest of their lives. And it’s HARD. It takes support and unrelenting diligence.
We need to do better by addicts. We need to do better by Madi. The paradigm needs to change. Insurance benefits needs to change. Public awareness needs to change. Period.
If you’ve read this far you’re either a family member, a friend or a fan. To the family members and friends: I love you and am forever indebted to you. I know that you know that I loved her and raised her with the best security and love and opportunities we all want for our children. You have been there. You have loved. You have supported. I know who you are and I love you.
For the fans: I’ve blocked some of you but not all of you. My hope is this post humbles you and your judgement.
Comments have been turned off but this post has been made public for those who wish to share. Addiction doesn’t discriminate. I will forever advocate for each and every addict because they deserve every bit of space on this earth as we do. Every bit of love and peace and opportunity.
Feel free to share this post. Raise awareness. Make waves. Take up space. And if any of this hits home with you, reach out to me. You’re not alone. I, and a whole group of others are with you. Judgement free.
With upmost love and respect I share my story.
XO
Missy
