Maternity Leave (Short Destiel Fanfic) *completed*

The News

"OH! Oh! I know!" Charlie squealed and Dean stared wide-eyed at her madly grinning face, his mouth slack and little drunken hiccups tumbling out every so often.

"Wh-whaat?" he slurred and blinked rapidly and flapped his hand at Charlie 2 so she'd go away. He just wanted one Charlie.

"You should- you should-" she gasped for breath after her enthusiastic and suspenseful repetition of the two words. She stared around the store dazedly and her eyes lit up at the first thing she saw on the shelf on the counter by the cashier. She stumbled madly towards it.

"You should take a pregnancy test!" she said and grabbed a box, holding it up in the air victoriously. Dean looked at her in amazement and grinned widely. She giggle-snorted and shoved the box at him and he burst into happy laughter.

"Thatttt- That is the best idea ever!" he exclaimed and flopped all over Charlie in an attempt at a hug. Charlie's body tilted back precariously and then she shoved him back with a grunt. She wiped the tears from her eyes as she continued giggling uncontrollably.

"W-wait!" she whispered and clumsily put the box on the counter where three amused looking cashiers rung the three tests up. Three? Dean stared in confusion. Why did the store have THREE cashiers and when did Charlie pick up two more boxes?

Charlie emptied the contents of her wallet and dragged Dean out the door. Dean stumbled along after her to the gas station outside.

"Wh-where you goin'?" he asked loudly into Charlie's ear.

"Bathroooom," she slurred and hiccuped, turning to grin at him and then almost tripping over herself. He grinned dopily.

"Thas, thas smaaaart. Charlie youuu're smart," he drawled lazily and Charlie squeaked a happy "I know!" before they were stumbling into the bathroom.

"In there!" she said and ushered him in.

"W-wait, is it mens??" he asked confusedly. She scoffed.

"Men cant have babies, handmaiden!" she yelled in his face and he blinked.

"Ohh.. oh right," he said, snorted at the thought and then frowned.

"But then why am I- why am I doing it?" he slurred and stumbled to keep up with Charlie who was trying to push him into a stall.

"I- I dunno. You're my handmaiden," she said, bewildered and they stared at each other for a while.

"Hokay," Dean said promptly and took the box from Charlie. He turned towards the toilet and Charlie closed the door behind him.

He opened the box and the test stick fell out, he squawked and dropped to his knees trying to find it. He heard Charlie say something but not the words. He gave a triumphant yell when he found the stick.

He picked it up and unzipped his pants with his other hand.

"Okkk, ok I'm doing it!" He said excitedly.

"Yayyyyyy," he heard Charlie squeal.

He peed on the stick, except most of it got on the floor and his shoes. That was alright, as long as he peed on the stick too. He smiled.

"Areeee youuu donnneee?" Charlie whined and banged a fist on the door.

"Waiiit, I think. I think you have to wait," he said, remembering that the stick didn't tell you yes or no until you waited a while. He was smart too, he thought happily.

"Ohhh yeah," Charlie said understandingly and they both waited. Until Charlie got bored and opened the stall, telling Dean to zip up his pants because "ewww, man parts" and then asking him what the stick said.