Aruden Oneshots

Rudy Becomes The Dungeon Master

Suggested by HereComesDaSun22. Next oneshot by sleep-can-wait. PM me or comment here if you have suggestions <3

"Look at what I found!" Rudy yelled, bursting into the museum lobby and holding what looked like a board game held high above his head in the holy position.

"What?" Aru asked, annoyed. She flicked a Flamin' Hot Cheeto at Mini, who squealed and batted the half-eaten orange puff away. "Eew, germs!"

"I have found this mythical game...where we can be heroes..." Brynne popped her head out from the kitchen.

"Is it Candyland?" she asked. "I love Candyland. Once, I ate five whole little gingerbread men from that board." Aiden scratched the back of his head. "Umm...Brynne, those aren't edible." Brynne scoffed. "Of course they are. The game is candy, is it not?"

"MOVING ON," Rudy yelled, obviously excited, "The mythical game is called...Dungeons and Dragons!" Everyone except Aru groaned.

"I. Love. Dragons," she said. "Count me in."

"Shah, have you actually ever played Dungeons and Dragons?" Aiden asked her. She growled at him.

"No. But I can LEARN. She crushed up a Hot Cheeto and shoved the crumbs into the front of his shirt. He glared at her as he shook it out.

The group pored over the rules for a few minutes and drew their characters. Aru sketched an elf wizard girl who was also a queen with infinite attack power, because she felt like it, as she so proudly stated when the rules were discussed. Aiden was a warrior, Brynne was a "magical taste-tester," Mini was a healer, and Rudy was a snake.

"Just a snake?" asked Aru.

"I like snakes," Rudy pouted.

"Who's going to be the Dungeon Master?" asked Mini. Rudy scratched his chin.

"Can snakes mate with healers?"

"Um, what???!!!"

"Hmm, guess not. I'll be the Dungeon master then. It might be hard to manage without my snaky awesomeness, but you'll manage!" Mini, who was still bright red, handed him the dice, and Aru feared what would happen if Rudy was the Dungeon Master, but it was too late. He had begun.

"So, you Potatoes are walking through a field of...potatoes. Then, a giant potato monster rises up from the ground! What do you do?"

"Fight him!" growled Brynne. She rolled the die and cursed when a 2 showed on the face.

"Unfortunately, Brynne, you try to fight him by shooting baked goods at him and then he eats you so you are dead," Rudy explained. Aru holds up her hand, silencing Brynne's protests.

"Hold on, how do we know this potato is a he?" she said. "I mean, come on, it's the twenty-first century here."

"Because I say he's a he, and that's why!" Rudy growled. "Now, as I was saying..."

"Can I bring Brynne back to life?" Mini interrupted. Rudy smiled at her. "Of course, mera pyar. Of course."

"Wait, so Mini can bring someone back to life without rolling the die?" Aiden asked. "And yet we can't discuss the potato's gender..."

The Potatoes spent the rest of the game arguing amongst themselves and throwing Flamin' Hot Cheetos at each other. It was the first and last game of Dungeons and Dragons they ever played.