This is the story of D'arii, Nicolas, Sofie, Julie, and Mateo. They all live together in their cramped apartment. This. This is the story.
knees of knees! enjoy because i sure as hell didn't
Yo guys it's Kanye West and I'll be narrating todays story. *licks fingers and turns the page*
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Sofia walked into the kitchen, her hair knotted and her shirt basically falling off her body. It was 1 in the morning but she had the munchies. Fat bitch! She rummaged through the cabinets and pulled out a box of Lucky Charms. Suddenly, the light flickered on and she could see her older brother Nicolas eating a taco.
"Oh shit bruh!! Why is you awake?" he asked.
She side eyed him, like an airheaded bitch... "What does it look like? I'm hungry," she responded as she poured the cereal into a bowl that was full of maggots.
"Bro," he started, but then choked on a piece of pubic hair. He coughed and coughed and coughed until he shat it out. Then he took a whiff of it. Scrumptious! "Mateo woke me up with his fuckass crying. So I made him a taco and placed it in his asshole. Then I got hungry, so here I am."
All of a sudden, the two siblings abruptly stopped chitchatting when they heard the noise of glass shattering downstairs. Oh no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Scared outta his mind, Nic woke D'arii up who then woke their son up. Then Sofie woke Julie up but this enraged Julie so she slapped Sofie, causing Nic to throw Mateo in between the two hooligans. The two year old now caught in the middle, he got slapped around multiple times until he passed out. He was foaming at the mouth. Phew! Crisis averted.
Now... about that window shattering? What did the gang do? Well!! Allow me, yours truly, Kanye West to tell you the story of that.
"The hell was that noise?" D'arii, the only normal one asked.
"I think someone just broke in!!" Julie responded. She was eating her hair. This pissed Nic off so he punched her.
With the two cousins now fighting, Julie got the upper hand and flung Nicolas down the stairs. D'arii shrieked and rushed down the stairs to help him, and this is where she noticed the dirty homeless man that broke into their house rummaging through the living room!!! D'arii, now entirely petrified that the homeless bum would hurt her husband or son, ripped Nic's left nut off and threw it at him. Mind you Mateo is seizing on the floor and Nic's testicle has just been forcefully torn off.
The homeless man, who we'll call Bob for the duration of this story, wasn't having it!! He mumble-yelled something about hating bitches and with all his homeless might, he picked up a recliner and chucked it at D'arii who was standing in front of Nic's no nutsack body. It hit D'arii who fell on top of Nic, inevitably killing them both.
Bob dusted himself off and trudged up the stairs. Noticing Mateo's little baby body, he stepped on his head and it exploded like a watermelon from those rubber band challenges back in 2017. Then, his head snapped to the left when he heard Julie and Sofie singing "3am innat hotel, bitch I'm missin' you-"
SHANK!! Blood pouring everywhere. I'll let you use your big imaginations to create a scene of what he did. Go wild!!!!!!!!!!!
With everyone in the house dead, Bob claimed his territory and took a seat on the toilet. A loud shart erupted. Bob is now a content man.
