"Alright, honey, I'm going to miss you so much." My mother cried as she hugged me.
"I know mom, but it'll just be till I'm okay." I rubbed her back.
"We'll visit." she said pulling back with tear filled eyes.
"Bye, mom. I love you."
And with that I made my way into the Mental Hospital. I'm putting myself in to keep from committing suicide. Life's been hard and I don't know how much longer I can hold on. But I know my mom needs me, and I can't leave her. So I'm getting help.
I pushed open the door and walked up to the desk where a middle aged woman sat, typing away at her computer.
"Hello, how can I help you?" She asked politely.
"I'm Austin Shawl, I called the other day." I told her.
"Austin, of course, I remember you. We've gotten the room all ready for you. Just fill out this form, and we will be doing a full check of your luggage only for safety purposes." She smiled.
"Yeah, sure, of course." I said as I walked away from the desk and sat in a chair.
Filling out the form felt good, I'm doing something right. This is good. I kept telling myself.
I took the form back up to the woman.
"Alrighty, head on back to room 503, your nurse will be in to see you in a while and in the mean time some of the guards will check your luggage." She smiled pointing down a hall.
"Thank you." I said.
I took a deep breath and started down the long hall, seeing people who did look sick and ill. Others looked normal, like me. But that's the thing, I'm not normal.
After having 2 guards rummage through my things they came to the realization that everything was fine. Once they left I started to look around and un pack. Trying to make the white, spotless room become some what homey.
"Knock knock." I voice called from the door.
"Come in." I called back, putting clothes in the closet.
A girl with long brown hair in waves came in, in her uniform with a almost too pleasant smile on her face.
"Hi, I'm Lily, I'll be your nurse." She said happily.
"Austin." I said walking over to her, sticking out my hand.
She willingly shook it before looking down at her clipboard.
"So, Austin, since I will be checking on you, would you mind talking?" She asked.
"Talking? About what?" I asked her, confused.
"Sorry, I'm not really good at this yet, I'm kinda new here." She laughed.
I nodded.
"I just mean, um, why are you here? I haven't gotten the paper work yet." She said straightening up.
"I'm here because I need help, and I don't want to hurt myself." I told her.
"Good, that's good. Um, call me if you need anything, the buzzer is right here near the bed so if you need me buzz it. I'm going to let you un pack, get comfortable. The meal times are breakfast at 9, lunch at 12 and dinner at 5." She said smiling before leaving the room.
I sighed and sat down on the bed.
This is good....
By the time dinner rolled around they'd given me a few choices. I just had pizza. Lily brought in a notebook and a pen and told me I could write in it if I got bored. She's nice, very...chipper. I met a couple other nurses who were pretty cool.
I can't call anybody, at least not yet.
I heard some good stories about people successfully getting out of here better, but I'm paranoid I might be better but it'll get bad again.
When my dad died, I fell apart, and that's when the depression hit. I could hardly go to school, after graduation things got a little better, but not really. There were attempts at suicide, drug overdoses. Then I realized, my mom and Katie need me.
Especially Katie, my kid sister, when dad died she wasn't really phased. I wasn't surpised, she didn't spend much time with him. She's only 15 but she's been through a lot.
I realized I needed help when I got my stomach pumped, and I looked over to see my crying mother and sister by my hospital bed side. I can't leave them like dad did.
A knock at the door pulled me out of my thoughts.
"Come in."
Lily popped her head in. "It's getting late, you should sleep. There's a curfew but, if you can't sleep that's okay. Goodnight." She said.
"Goodnight." I said.
She closed the door behind her.
She was something, very up beat and I could tell she was new even before she told me. Better her than Mrs. Phillips, I met her at dinner, she's a older woman and she's very intimidating, with her hair tied back in a tight bun and the scour she gives everyone.
Lily joined me at dinner because she didn't want me to be alone. I'd learned she's 18 and got this job because Mary, the owner of the facility gave her the job when Lily needed a job.
I just hope all this works...
