The Silent Playlist

Track 8 Maalala Mo Sana

Margareth Chua-Alejandro

"Happy Anniversary Mommy and Daddy!" My twins greeted me and their Dad with so much glee.

"Thank you my princesses!" Vince tried to lift the both of them they looked wonderful. I took a photograph of that precious moment.

"This is sweet, girls. I love you Via and Viel!" And I kissed them both on their forehead.

AFTER

Vince Alejandro

"Waaaaah!" Nagising ako dahil nagkaron ako ng panaginip. Bumalik nanaman yung panaginip ko na yun.

The next day, I came to see her.

"How are you, Vince?" She flashed her smile at me again. I was annoyed.

"I dreamt of the accident again." I said with poker face on.

"It's part of coping up, habang buhay na nakatatak sayo yan. Hindi na natin yan pwede maalis." She said.

"Bakit pa ba ako bumalik dito? I knew you are going to tell me the same damn thing." I'm so frustrated.

"Calm down, Vince. I advise na learn how to forgive yourself, little by little, if you want to recover from that phase in your life." I clenched my fists.

"I will never forgive myself. It was my fault. Why can't you all just blame me for everything and stop being so kind kasi yun naman talaga ang totoo!" I burst out, again.

"If you continue to think that way, I don't know if you'll ever recover from what happened." She said tears starting to fall from her eyes.

Tinalikuran ko sya and headed somewhere. Sa haven namin.

I don't see the point of them being so nice to me, na parang wala akong kinalaman sa nangyari. It was all my fault. They should blame me. Yung doctor na yun, alam ko, nararamdaman ko gusto nyang magalit sa akin, gusto ko silang magalit sa akin pero bakit hindi nila gawin. I was the one to blame pero ako ang halos pinangangalagaan nila. And that's not making me feel any better.

BEFORE

Margareth Chua

"Mags, congrats!!!" She was smiling at me, gusto ko pa sanang maniwala sa mga ngiti na yan eh. Gusto ko pa sanang maniwalang masaya talaga sya para sa akin pero nung nalaman ko na kinaibigan nya lang ako para matalo ng Kuya nya, mas gusto ko na syang sigawan at sabunutan.

"Ah, sige." Pero hindi ko ginawa dahil kaibigan ko sya. Tinalikuran ko nalang sya. At pumunta sa next class ko.

"Maggie, may problema ba tayo?" Hinila nya ako. Naalala ko tuloy ang una naming pagkikita ganito rin, hinila nya rin ang kamay ko. "You know, you can tell me everything, I'm your bestfriend diba?" She smiled.

Mas lalo akong na-annoy sa kanya. Akala mo inosente. "Mamaya nalang tayo mag-usap malelate ako." At tinalikuran ko na sya ng tuluyan. Hindi nya na rin ako hinabol. Hindi ko maisip kung bakit nya gustong gawin sakin yun, lalo na't alam nya naman kung gaano kahalaga sakin ang pagaaral ko.

After class, nagusap kami. Sa tambayan namin. Sa maliit na playground nitong school. Kapag andito na kami, wala ng napunta rito. Bukod sa nakauwi na yung mga bata, may say rin si Sab dito kasi shareholder ang pamilya nya ng school.

"Bakit kanina mo pa ako hindi pinapansin?" She asked with her sad eyes.

Naupo ako sa swing, "Sabine, alam ko na. Kinaibigan mo lang ako dahil gusto mong matalo ako ng Kuya mo sa acads. Hindi ko alam kung bakit mo kinailangan gawin pa yun."