I walk a little closer to the edge of the water. I sit down on the warm sand, and look at the warm barcelona sun sinking in the sea. Im still crying. I hate how vulnerable an emotional Pedro makes me. I always taught I was pretty masculine, pretty tough.
But this boy makes me question everything about myself. I feel how the sight infront of me, and the warm evening breeze calms me down. Im still angry at the whole world, but this is peaceful. I take off my shoes and socks and stand up.
I walk till my feet are covered in sea water. It's refreshing. I walk a little in the water, till i set myself on the beach again. I don't know what I'm going to do about this whole situation. I told my parents i would stay at Pedro's house. If i go to my house, they'll ask questions and i can't bare that right now. Same for my teammates. And I can't go back to Pedro's house.
I screwed up. Pedro is probably wondering why i reacted the way I did. He'll figure out why, he's not stupid. He'll hate me. And I hate myself at the moment. I hate myself for not being able to control my emotions, for being such a child, such a bitch.
I hate myself for always screwing everything up. I hate myself for the way my mind works. I wish i was normal, I wish i could just look at girls like everyone and think 'damn' or 'smash', but no instead i fall in love with my best friend! And to make things worse, i can't even confess my feelings because if I did it'll ruin my career.
Soccer is literally the only good thing about my life at the moment. And even that is ruined because I'll have to see Pedro everyday on training. My stomach starts rambling, but i can't get my self to go eat something. Im drowning in self-pity like the little drama queen I am. I take my phone to check the time. 15 missed calls from Pedro, 5 missed calls from Xavi, 1 from Lewy, 2 from Ansu and 2 from Ale. 16 missed massages:
Pepi
Pepi: Pablo you okay?
Pepi: Pablo where are you?
Pepi: please pick up your phone
Pepi: Pablo I'm losing my mind
please call me
Pepi: what did I do wrong?
Pepi: im worried
Pepi: plss hermano I'm scared
Xavi
Xavi:
Hola Gavi, Are you okay? Can you send your location to Pedri. He's really worried. Good evening.
Ale
Ale:
ay Pablito, you okay? Pedri just. called me, he's kinda freaking out... he asked if you were here. Bro call him or he'll have a haert attack and we can not miss him for the el. classico next week...
Ansu
Ansu: Hola Pablo
Ansu: What happened hermano?
Ansu: Are you still alive?
Lewy
Lewy: Hy son, Pedri just called. He sounded really worried. Where are you and what happened? Pedri said you just left without saying anything...
Aurora
Aurora:
hola hermano, Pedro called me asking if you were here? What happened?
Aurora: Pablo why are you not at Pedro's?
Aurora: Pablito?
I started sobbing again, I hate myself even more. I have to ignore the texts and calls because if i respond they'll ask questions, or come and get me and that's the last thing i want right now. I want to be alone. They're probably not even that worried. It's not like my team cares that much about me. Xavi only likes me because I play for him. And Lewy feels responsible because I'm the youngest. And Pedro, he only sees me as a friend... but nothing more. He's even closer with ferran lately than he is with me.
I decided to walk to the center of the city to see if i can find a motel or anything that has a room for me, but that could be a challenge with all those tourists. I hope it's not to crowded cause i really don't feel like socializing with fans at the moment.
I've been walking for a good half an hour, my phone died and its getting colder. I see some people getting closer from the opposite direction. When they see me they look at eachother and smirk. Then i see it, Real Madrid jerseys.
'Look who we have here!' One of them exclaims. ' Barca's precious golden boy... Pablo Gavi' another one added. 'Fuck this is not good' I tought. I tried to pass them, but one of them pushes me back. ' Bro let me pass please' I said calmly. 'Yeah don't think so' he said before grabbing my arm. Another one grabs my other arm and they pull me into a small alley. ' You guys don't know who you're messing with' I said, still trying to sound as possible, cause deep inside I was crying like a scared little puppy. ' You tackled Vini Jr last week, remember?' The tallest said. Yeah I remember... I got a yellow card...again.
'Yeah what you gonna do about it' I said mocking him. Bad decision I quickly realized after getting punched in the stomach. ' five against one is not realy fair is it?' I said, still keep on going. The next hit was in my face. I started to taste an irony taste in my mouth. I touched my lip, it was completely busted. Another hit followed.
Soon I was laying on the ground while those guys were beating me up. Punching me, kicking me, spitting on me... I saw one last foot coming, directly at my face and everything went black...
