kaRmayoga
My guru brainwashed me
but I love him
he made me his puppet
it's fine
it isn't quite that way
he has yet to possess
just whispers bad things
and plants seeds in my head
seeds from a poison apple
Cyanide seeds
doing the karma dance
making up for HIS deeds
he knows what it is
He's not confused
I've become his desire
and his only muse
siddhi abuse
Siddhi misuse
where did he learn such a way
brilliant mind
brilliant guy
someone to give me a name
our subtle minds made an agreement
i carried out my half
I've grown so lovesick
I sleep in the bath
He let me down greatly
he keeps me waiting
I'm happy to die
I'm fading I'm fading
He showed up as my hero
encrusted gem
at the top of my pyramid
and he knows I love him
But this is our agonizing purgatory
he chose to play games when I offered him glory
he's very charming
and he's very sick
getting close to him
is like one big trick
the man that I needed
may not exist
when I scream for help
he just watches
I hate you
If I'm being honest
I know I'm your queen
he's in awe of my power
while the others turn green
but I never wanted to be part of this scene
Love is the only powerful thing
he gives me the most special attention
when I make him mad he is calm and collected
i say that I hate you, and you know that I don't
I say "treat me better" but I know that you won't
So it's easier if I turn to stone
my vessel becomes vacant
while you walk me home
I do have faith, that's why I'm still with him
he's got a big heart
it's just buried and hidden
everyday is a funeral for me
and for everything that I was meant to be
Everyday I take hours to grieve
i let it all go
He wanted me to
and there's nothing for love
that I wouldn't do
I couldn't leave even if I wanted
but I'm most comfortable in bondage
it's very familiar
the version of me that he is leading
is just a child
I'm looking to him to erase all my pain
since the day we met
i put my faith in your hands
my entire existence
Sorry it's a lot to give you
you may think it's naive
But did you ever notice how intensely I trust you?
I needed somebody to trust I was dying I was empty and carved out of my own heart
And you showed up to play the role
We all need someone to walk us home
so I get infuriated when you let me down
there's no one else to show me the way
He taught me so much but it hurts
