Redemption

Chapter 1

"Yeah, It's over. It'll never change between us. What's the point?" Trevor said with a tear rolling down his face. He walked to the door, opened it and walked out.

I wanted to feel nothing, wanted the world to just end in this very moment. Everything I had worked for and busted my ass day and night just walked out the door. All the fighting and relationships I damaged all for him. I threw my fists at the door with frustration as tears ran down my face and I screamed out his name. He didn't care, he walked out the door and left me here alone. The love of my life, my future, the one I wanted to call my husband gone. In disbelief I grabbed my phone and began calling him on every app I could until I was blocked. I couldn't just let him walk away without fighting for him, why was he doing this to me; to us? Tears dripped onto my phone and my heart contracted in my chest. It was over; really over this time. I felt like I couldn't breathe and the world was closing in on me. I opened the door and ran toward the street. It was raining but I didn't care if I could just catch him, we could talk this out and come to a solution. My world had just disappeared and I could do nothing about it. I fell to my knees and let the rain hit my face. I was soaked and dressed in all white pjs passing cars were sure to get a show. His face flooded my brain and tears filled my eyes once again. I'd never see or touch him again, his pure blue eyes and light blonde stubble as I ran my hand across his face. I didn't want to be alive in this moment if this is life without him and it hasn't even been 24 hours.

The rain was coming down harder now and thunder roared through the sky bringing it to life as lightning struck. I was cold; I knew that but didn't mind. I barely had any clothes on just my tank top and shorts. Cars honked as they passed and a few rolled down the window and whistled; you were really gone. I didn't want this to be real, it couldn't be. This was a dream and I'd wake up tomorrow and laugh with you holding me in your arms. I pinched myself to test the theory and a small drop of blood hit the payment; it was real. Defeated, I lifted myself up and made my way back to our or my apartment now. The storm began to pick up but I didn't care, let it take me away. I looked around and saw a happy couple kissing in the rain and my heart ached for you. I reached the door and opened it and walked to the bathroom. Tervors toothbrush was still on the counter. I glanced at myself in the mirror. I was a mess, you could see everything. My nipples were hard and my face drained of color like I had seen a ghost. My dark brown hair looked black when wet mixed with blonde highlights. I had brown eyes and olive skin. I wasn't fat but wasn't a twig either. The thin white fabric clung to my skin showing my wolf tattoo on my thigh.

I turned the shower on and let the stream warm the bathroom as I just sat at the edge of the tub slowly rocking myself back to reality. What would I tell everyone, when would he come back for all his stuff? Why should I even care he's the one that left me. I removed my wet clothes and hopped in the shower, the water warming my body. Tears ran down my cheek as reality began to come back into focus and blood ran down my leg. There went our baby. The one he wanted from the start. I never even got to inform him he'd be a daddy. I guess it didn't even matter at this point. I washed the blood away along with the rest of the day. Shampoo dripped in my hands as I squeezed the bottle and I massaged it into my head and tried to wash away the hurt. I looked at the conditioner bottle and picked it up dreading the last few minutes of the shower and repeated the same process. I turned the shower off and grabbed my black robe and walked to the bedroom.

I changed into something more comfortable just grabbing whatever undergarments available as I stuck a pad in my underwear . I saw my freshly washed pink sweat out with diamonds on the side and put that on. I searched the kitchen for my keys and found them in the golden dragon bowl. Putting my shoes on I almost lost my balance but grabbed the door to steady me and made my way to the hospital. Every song that played on the radio just reminded me of Trevor so I turned it off. It was up to me I'd just lay in bed and whatever happens, happens. Maybe there was a small chance the baby was ok. I didn't even know how to think about being a mother without him. I turned into the emergency room, found a parking spot, put the car into park and let out a scream. A lady walking to her car with her son gasped and her son looked frightened. I watched as she strapped her son in the car and another tear fell from my eyes. She looked up at me and began walking to my car. Great. She had blonde hair and green eyes, her hair was curled and she was holding an umbrella above her head. She knocked on my window and I wanted to scream again. She motioned for me to roll down the window; I really did not want to but I complied.