I'll remind you

3

I sat there, revisioning everything that had happened during our little hangout. I wish I hadn't planned to see her so early. Something in me really wanted to just stay with her longer. But I'd be asking way too much. Right now I needed to worry about what I'd be doing for her birthday. I needed to go to the store and that's where I was headed right now. She said she liked salmon... fuck it's hard to think like this. Maybe I needed a cigarette or two before I actually started thinking.

You

As soon as I got into my apartment I felt my heart do all kinds of crazy thumps. Did I really kiss Diavolo? What the hell is wrong with me! I was hoping it was just my substandard memory but it wasn't. I knew what I did. I think I lost my mind. He doesn't know I "like" him, and I just gave him a big hint!! I'll just say... I did it to be nice! What? Who kisses someone on the cheek to be nice? How stupid... instead, I'll just pray he doesn't ask tomorrow.

Speaking of which, all I remember is he said we're hanging out tomorrow. I need to find something to wear. Well... I don't even know when we're meeting up, maybe I could find that tomorrow. It would be way better to hang out with him right now. I sighed and slipped off my shoes, leaving them by the door. My lips trilled as I walked to my bed. It was only 11 am. Maybe I'd go out somewhere later, though I'm not fond of doing things alone. My friends are tired of me and Diavolo probably is too. Thinking of that made me tired. Maybe I'm tired of myself.

Before giving it further thought, I eyed had shut and my thoughts had gone away as I fell asleep. In my dress. With my hair done.

-

Later that day

I woke up from the sound of ringing. Phone ringing. My phone was. Ringing. Oh. I sat up and tapped on my nightstand looking for my phone, Although it sounded more like a bang. I finally found my phone and picked up on the last ring. "Hellooo." I slouched back into the covers of my bed to the point where my whole face was almost covered. "Goodness, you sound terrible. Did I wake you up?" I groaned and squeezed my eyes shut. I didn't know I was sleep til 6 pm. 6 PM?!

"Bingo. What'd you need?" I heard a little bit of music in his background. I knew at least he wasn't at home because it sounded to be coming from a stores speaker. "Do you like red velvet cake? Mm.. or maybe triple chocolate.." what the hell is he talking about? "Cake? Why do we need cake..." I heard a 'hmm' sound from across the line. "Don't worry about it. Answer the question." I thought about it for a little. "Um... I guess red velvet is good.."

I didn't really know. "Thanks." I heard a grocery basket's wheels rolling and squeaking. God, why was I so tired? I wasn't even that tired when I got up.. "I'll talk to you later okay?" I couldn't find another way to hang up. "Okay. I'll see you. Don't sleep in too late." I smiled and said goodbye before hanging up. Maybe he wasn't tired of me. The thought of him made me smile. I really just wanted to hug him again. Smell his faint cologne one more time. He's so dreamy.

Diavolo

I could barely find any cakes at this stupid store. At least not any of the ones I was looking for. They didn't have any chocolate cake. I mean.. what store doesn't have chocolate cake? "Excuse me.. do you by chance have any red velvet cakes available? It's urgent." I don't even get why I'm shopping here. The cakes in the bakery area are probably stale and cold. The half awake employee looked at me like I was crazy.

"What's up with your hair?? I mean uh.. no. We're short on cakes sir. Sorry." His voice was grating, as if he was mid way into puberty. How irritating. "Not one? Whatever." I tried to hide my eye roll before walking away. I noticed the boy was cussing under his breath. I simply ignored it and walked away. It wasn't my fault if he got fired.

This is the second store I've been to. I have the salmon, I have the shrimp, I have the pasta, fuck, I even have the card. But the cake? No luck. It's never been this hard to find a fucking cake. I sighed and decided I'd find the cake tomorrow. I got in my car, urgently waiting for (f/n) to call me again, which probably wouldn't happen. She's probably tired of me. I could feel a headache start just like it did this morning. It was probably a tension headache. I need to calm down a little.

I felt a sense of relief when I had gotten into my apartment, although it was dark and cold. Seriously, nobody comes here. It hasn't been cleaned in what feels like years. I slowly walked over to put the food I had bought in the freezer. The last thing I need is the house smelling like fish. I exhaled in an exaggerated way and walked over to my room, loosening my tie as I did so.

I looked at myself in my bathroom mirror, noticing how messy my hair had gotten. I was more focused on if I'd wear a high ponytail tomorrow. That'd be different, right? She'd like that..

I unbuttoned my shirt halfway and relaxed in my bed while reading a book that was developing dust on my nightstand that had a bunch of random shit on it. I was tempted to get a drink to go with my book, but I told myself I'd cut off because (f/n) told me it was for the best. It's really hard to keep promises. I chewed the inside of my lip thinking about it. I couldn't focus on the words printed inside my 400 page book. And before I knew it, I was standing up again.

You

It was really really hard to sleep last night. I had a dream, no, a nightmare that Diavolo... well.. that he treated me like my friends do. And then he left. Just like everyone else. Sure, it hurts that the others left, but when it comes to Diavolo.. it hurts just a little (whole lot) more. And I felt my eyes start to sting, again, and then I woke up for the fifth time. It was 11 am, which was surprising with my unpleasant sleep.

My non stop sweat through the night made my white spaghetti strap tank top stick to my chest, and my pajama shorts stick to my thighs. I felt dried tears on my cheeks, and that made me feel weird so I went to go wash my face.

Just a little bit of mascara was smeared on my face. That's the only makeup I really wear now, and I guess I forgot to wash it off. I knew the dream wasn't real, but it felt real, and I didn't know if it actually happened. Isn't there something special today? Fuck I hate this. Why would Diavolo be up at 8 am?? I mean, he was yesterday, but what if something happened? What's my deal with overthinking? Maybe I'll just go back to sleep. But I didn't. I tried to call Diavolo. It's like that's by instinct or something.

It dialed, and dialed, and dialed but he didn't answer. The typical 'you have reached the voicemail of' sentence sounded and I instantly hung up. I think this is the first time he actually hasn't answered my call. I needed to calm down. It was eight in the fucking morning for christ sake. I think he told me when he normally gets up once, but I may or may not've forgot. No, I just need to leave him alone. I went in my kitchen and decided to make some breakfast.