When I see the object the puts me to ease and takes away my pain, but I also see to that, the thing that takes away my pain makes the people around me suffer as well. They worry and cry for me, and I don't care because all I care about is taking the pain away from myself, when I know I can never truly "take away the pain". I could just end my life here and not say goodbye to anyone , but I'm afraid to die, I'm afraid of what might happen if I don't cut deep enough and I wake up in a hospital with my arms patched up. Only my close family would be there because no one else cares if I were to die anyways. If I ended it now I could be free, well at least my spirit could be free, it wouldn't have to suffer with all this pain and agony I go through every day. I dream about what it would be like to die and from what I can imagine, I like it alot better than living here.
