Awesamdream - His Beloved Warden [Fic 1]

25. Difficult Confession

Dream stayed awake, going around in circles in his head about what to do, the whole time Sam was sleeping. Maybe he could actually just let Quackity go, and tell Sam everything so Sam didn't find out later. Sam would be mad, but not as mad as he'd be if Quackity was actually killed and he somehow learned about it. Dream couldn't shake the feeling that he would eventually. But if he just confessed now and got it over with, maybe he could make it up to Sam.

At one point, he messaged Punz to ask him to go talk to Quackity, and ask him if he would accept a payment to ensure his silence if Dream let him go. Punz reported back that Quackity had laughed and said no. Dream sighed when he saw the message. He had expected that but it still annoyed him.

Maybe he would just kill him. But then his ghost could come around...

Dream looked down at the end of the couch where Fran was curled up, snoozing too. There was no easy way forward for him. He may just talk to Sam about it and apologize. He'd let Quackity go. That would be the good thing to do, and he wanted to be good. That's what Sam wanted from him, and it'd be hard to do, but maybe it was the better choice.

But he really wasn't looking forward to having that conversation with him. Maybe he could try to get Sam in a good mood first?

Dream was still fretting over it when Sam shifted, then yawned and lifted his back as he stretched. Sam blinked his eyes open, looking at Dream and smiling in a loving way that made Dream's heart skip a beat. "Hey."

"Hey," Dream said. He moved closer and Sam lifted his head, brushing their lips together.

They kissed for a few moments, and Sam's hand moved to Dream's cheek, tilting his head so he could kiss him deeper. Dream grew warm and would have happily kept going, but he made himself pull away, not wanting to get distracted from what he needed to do.

Sam's eyes searched his and he frowned. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Just..." It would have been so easy for Dream to lie and say he was just still worried about Sam. But he's spent so much time lying. He needed to be honest. "There's something I need to tell you."

"What is it, love?"

Dream's chest twisted. If he did this, he might not ever hear Sam call him that again. But it was the right thing to do. Sam would want him to be honest. "I... I did something very bad." His voice dropped to a whisper and he hunched his shoulders, looking away.

Sam was quiet for a moment, then moved his hand from Dream's face to his shoulder, squeezing it. He lowered his voice too. "What did you do?"

"It's Quackity. After he kidnapped you, and... and tried to kill me. I left to look for you, but I told Punz..." Dream kept looking away, not wanting to see how Sam might be reacting. "To catch Quackity for me, hold him somewhere and... try to make him talk. About where you were."

Sam's fingers clenched and then let go, dropping away. "Dream," he said, sounding upset.

"He wouldn't tell Punz, so I went to talk to him," Dream continued. "He told me he wasn't going to talk. That I would have to die for him to let you go. I got mad, and... I hurt him." Dream closed his eyes, even as Sam touched his face and turned it back toward him. "I thought about everything he had done to me, and then how he dragged you into things, and I just wanted to hurt him. I know I shouldn't have. But I did. And I... I wanted to kill him."

Sam inhaled sharply.

"But I didn't," Dream said quickly. "No matter how much I want my revenge, it... wouldn't be right, for me to do that. So I wanted to tell you. I knew you'd still be upset, I'm supposed to be good now, but thought... maybe if I stopped now, and did the right thing and let him go, you'd be... be less upset?" He sighed, and forced his eyes open. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sam. I'm still so fucked up."