They don't need to know about us

1

If regret could kill, Lin Zi Hong would be a dead man now.

"I don't want to tell anyone about us."

That sentence was out of his mouth before he could think about how the younger one would react to it. Yu Teng's eyes fill with tears at the same time that he finishes speaking and the effort he makes not to cry hit Zi Hong like a punch in the stomach.

Why? 

Why can't they go around and demonstrate to everyone that they're together?

"What I'm for you?" Yu Teng asks in a broken voice.

Zi Hong mentally curses himself for being responsible for the other's tears.

Make Yang Yu Teng cry should be prohibited.

The phrase came out wrong, all he wants most is to kiss that man in front of all people and say that he is the lucky person who won the youngest's heart.

"You are the love of my life," he replies and starts to approach the other.

They are in the youngest's apartment, they spend most of their time here, ignoring the outside world, hiding inside their own bubble, inside their safe space.

Where they can talk and do whatever they want without any judgment.

Where they can love each other without any judgment.

Zi Hong is not ready to miss it.

He doesn't want that cruel world out there to come in here and try to destroy the best thing that ever happened to them, to him.

"All I want is to stick a warning on you, saying that you belong to me," Zi Hong starts with a calm speech.

He needs Yu Teng to understand why he can't and doesn't want to go around talking about their relationship.

"I'll never deny how I feel about you, but telling them what we are is an invitation for the whole world try to screw it up, because that's what they do."

As he speaks, he hugs Yu Teng around the waist and pulls him close, gluing their bodies together. 

Yu Teng just continues to stare at him, not saying anything and listening carefully.

"The media, the companies, the fans, they would all intrude even more in our lives and I don't want... I can't! I can't risk losing you," Zi Hong's voice is more serious and firm now.

People like to take pretty things and break them until losing nothing else.

People like to decide who you can love.

"You will never lose me," Yu Teng puts a hand on either side of the older man's face and also speaks in a serious tone.

Can he really promise that? 

Yes, he can.

But it's really worth the risk of ruining something beautiful, just to let people know they're together?

What would positively change in their relationship if people knew? Walking down the street holding hands? That's not enough.

"Love, you know what they're capable of," Zi Hong says, sighing and closing his eyes.

"I known," Yu Teng says and starts to caress the other's face.

He knows, he's seen relationships, romantic and otherwise, torn apart by a heartless impress, crazy fans and evil managers.

"I'm sorry I can't hold your hand in the middle of the street or be able to take you on a real date at a restaurant, but I can't risk losing what we have," Zi Hong says opening his eyes.

But it still hurts;

Still hurts have to hide what you feel;

Huts people saying that it's wrong love who you love.

"You're right, I'm sorry," Yu Teng gives a peck and hugs him, leaving their foreheads and noses touching.

But after all, what matters is that they have each other, they are each other's safe havens.

"You don't have to apologise...,"  Zi Hong says.

Another kiss

They know is enough.

"I can't lose you too," Yu Teng says.

They two close their eyes and feel each other's presence.

"One day, we won't go to have to hide anymore, I promise," Zi Hong says, still with his eyes closed.

No one needs to know about late-night conversations or declarations of love that they make at any time.

"I don't need them to know, I just thought...," Yu Teng says in a calm voice.

"I don't and I'll never be ashamed of loving you," Zi Hong says seriously, interrupting the youngest and they two open their eyes but don't pull away.

Nobody needs to know about the I love you's or how much they mean to each other.

"Thank you for loving me," Yu Teng says, opening a passionate smile that only Lin Zi Hong is able to provoke.

"Loving you is the best thing I've ever done," Zi Hong says brushing his lips against each other's.

They know they are the best thing that ever happened in each other's lives.

Soon the brushing turns into a kiss, which turns into a kiss, which gets deeper and deeper and more needy. They can't scream what they feel to the outside world, but that's okay, they don't need people to know they love each other, they already know it very well. Not being able to show affection in public is a small price to pay to protect that love and they would do anything to protect that love.