"Okay, remember just go straight to the back and shove all the ranch into the bag, then escape anyway you can, got it?" Darion stares at Buffo as he fixes his red clown wig. "Uh huh, I know, do you guys think this is a bad idea or is it just me?" Buffo twirls his thumbs and bites his lip. "Come on, man, just go in there, do it just like we rehearsed!" Darion smiles, "Good luck!" Darion and Mario speed off, leaving Buffo in front of McDonald's wearing a ridiculous Ronald McDonald costume they got from Party City, bearing a gun and a bag on his back.
He swiftly exhales as he walks into McDonald's. He reaches into his pocket with hesitation, grabbing the gun and raising it up. "E-everyone, get down, NOW," Buffo sternly yells, but stuttering a bunch. Everyone gasps, some people drop, some run out the door, the cashiers duck behind the counter. Buffo runs to the kitchen, searching for the box of ranch. After desperately running around the kitchen, flipping empty boxes and slipping on lettuce, Buffo finally found the ranch. He shoves all of it in his bag and jumps the counter, just as he's about to escape, the real Ronald McDonald jumps in front of Buffo. "How dare you.. How DARE you steal MY ranch!" Ronald pulls out a katana and poses with it, ready to swing. Buffo stares for a second, stammering, he quickly ducks as Ronald swings at his neck. He rolls backwards and aims his gun at Ronald. Ronald throws his katana and lunges at Buffo, they begin to wrestle on the ground. Buffo tries to shoot Ronald, but he knocks the gun out of his hand. Buffo finds the strength to push Ronald off him and dashes out the door, down the street. Ronald chased after him, never slowing down, running off the power of cheeseburgers.
Back to Darion and Mario
"I have way more tickets than you, loser," Mario teases. "You keep choosing games I suck at, cheater," Darion chuckles. As they're about to play the next game, Mario feels his phone vibrating in his pocket. He pulls it out and sees that it's Buffo calling. Mario answers and brings the phone up to his ear. "Hello?" "DUDE, I JUST ESCAPED, WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?" Buffo yells through the phone. "Did you get the ranch? We're at Chuck E. Cheese!" Mario replies excitedly. "YEAH, I GOT THE RANCH, RONALD MCDONALD BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF ME AND I'M ON THE RUN, I'M BEHIND WALMART, COME GET ME AND HURRY," Buffo pants. "We're coming, man, don't worry," Mario added, "cya!" He hung up the phone and put it in his pocket. "Did he do it?" Darion asks. "Yeah, but he got his ass beat, we gotta go get him!" Mario starts speed-walking towards the exit. "Jesus, we gave him a gun and he still got his ass beat!" Darion shakes his head and catches up to Mario.
Mario jumps into the driver sear, Darion in the passenger seat. They speed off to Walmart, hoping he's still there with the ranch. As Mario pulls around to the back of Walmart, his jaw drops as he sees Buffo standing there looking torn up. He stops the car and hits Darion on the shoulder lightly, signaling him to roll down the window. "What the fuck, man? What happened to the gun!? Did you not use it?" Mario shook his head, staring at Buffo with a confused look on his face. Buffo quickly jumps in the backseat, throwing the backpack full of ranch to the side. "GO!" Buffo yells. Mario steps on the gas, speeding off back to his house. All three run inside and Buffo begins emptying the backpack full of ranch onto the counter. "Holy shit, that's a lot of ranch," Darion marveled, his eyes and smile wide with excitement and happiness. "You guys owe me for this," Buffo sighs.
