not a big deal~carl grimes

<eighteen>

i had gone out to see enid later. i sat beside her 'hey girlie. what do you want to do?'

'this place is annoying me again so...'

'sneak out?' i sounded excited, i loved sneaking out with enid. she nodded as we stood up 'right, i'll get everything. i'm going to bring some new stuff though because the ladder broke so until i can fix it we can't get up there.'

i pulled a bag out from enids bed and packing comic books and nails so i could fix the ladder on th way back, the wood was still there on the floor.

we ran to a hidden spot on the wall, somewhere no one would see us, so we could put sticks through the wall to use as steps to climb over and get out. she went up first, me just getting there after her when i heard her get down on the other side.

i took her to a place i used to go to that was kind of far out. i built the tree house a month before enid came and before that, i would run all the way out here. 'how much further?' she complained.

'not far.' i stopped her. 'i heard something behind us, don't look, just run.'

we ran away from whatever was behind us. i assumed it was a walker but running was the only option as if no one knew we were leaving we had no weapons, therefore, no defence.

i stopped after a while 'i think we lost it.' i turned back and she wasn't there, 'enid!?' i called out, no answer.

i sighed, stepping one direction before a huge hoard came, pushing me the other way. once again i just ran before coming to a tatty, old white shed with lots of clutter outside. also outside were rick and carl. i ran to them panting 'do you have a weapon on you?'

i shook my head 'no, i i'm not supposed to be out so i didn't get one.'

his eyes rolled 'get behind us, just don't sneak out again, it's dangerous.'

'i can handle it.'

'no without a weapon.'

a walker grabbed my ankle, making me scream but before it bit me, carl shoved a pole through its skull, making it go limp. i scrambled to my feet ,pulling him into a hug 'thanks.'

'come on, let's go back.' carl tried to drag me away.

'i cant.' i stood still 'enid's still out here. i just had to run from that, and neither of us have weapons. i need to find her.'

'okay just be safe.' he handed me his knife for until i got back. he hugged me again, inhaling the minty scent of my hair that i had just washed yesterday. it seemed just the same as before except now, not greasy and i wore it down.

' i will, i promise.' we went our separate ways, me going off to find enid and rick and carl, going off to get back to alexandria.

i ran into enid not far from where we were. and she wasn't far from rick and carl either, in fact, we stayed just behind them for most of the walk back. i'll come back out tonight and fix the ladder, i don't want to do it right now.'

i stood from a distance ad deanna screamed at the others for fighting. i was leaning on the wall beside the gate and enid and carl were stood a bit forward. he turned to her 'you don't like me, do you?'

she didn't respond to him. she just walked off as i went to him 'don't worry, she took about a month to warm up to me.'

'was she this quiet and moody with you?'

'no, but,' i walked round so i was in front of him 'i was the only other girl our age here and i was also kind of quiet and from outside. i was the only one she could really bond with at first. she'll come around. she has to because i'm her best friend and you're the boy i like who kissed me in prison.' i giggled.

the next day, deanna held a party, somewhat of a welcome to them. even though i had been here longer, i didn't always feel comfortable around these people. i knew them all but always felt like i didn't. they still all felt like strangers, and i hated strangers. i spent the whole thing next to carl. he held my hand the whole time , even when i got nervous and it began to feel sweaty, he didn't let go. every time he saw me beginning to feel uncomfortable or on edge, he'd squeeze my hand for a few seconds to make me feel safe so that i would calm down.

i watched as sam put a stamp on ricks hand. he was probably my favourite kid, not because i actually liked him ,he always managed to get on my nerves somehow and he was always scared of something. i more liked him because he reminded me of before all this. he was only a few years younger so i was about his age when the world fell to pieces. he reminded me of the childish innocence i had before i started having to fend for myself. as much as he annoyed me, it was comforting to see that there were still people like that.

i left early ish in the night, a couple hours after it got dark. i didn't go back to where i had just moved in to. instead i went back to carls room as that was where i had slept the last few nights. he came back an hour or so after me. i appeared to already be asleep when he got back but i wasn't.

i heard rustling  as he took his shoes of before the bed dipped down to the right and he laid down beside me. his arm snaked around my waist and pulled me closer. his warm breath hit the back of my neck as he breathed softly, relaxing me as i drifted off.