Asailah

Chapter 1

His eyelids slowly opened as the sunlight penetrated his apartment room's fogged-up windows. For him, simply waking up was a very unpleasant and unwelcome sensation. The last thing he wanted was to leave the dimension of dreams, and the comfort of sleep, and go back to the cruelty in the reality of his life. He slowly regained his senses against his will, his skin feeling the hardness of the cheap mattress he hated so much, his nose smelling the dusty, grimy scent of his room, and his eyes graced with the terribly sordid sight that was the mess his room had been. Mentally, he was so terribly wounded, and physically, he was weak. Everything around him seemed to try its utmost to put him down, the bits of paint on the walls cracking and falling off, the creakiness of his bed that was heard upon every minuscule movement, and even the mere sight of fog on the window, serving accurately a metaphor as to how out of touch he seemed to have gotten with the outside world. Imperfection, everything in his life seemed imperfect, which depressed him to no end. Simply existing dished out a deep pain for him he was so desperate to shake off. He lay there on his bed, showing no signs of intention to get up and do something. He had tried everything already, and nothing, in particular, had worked. At that moment, he felt like the rubble and dirt the earth walked on, and he wanted nothing more than to go to sleep again and never wake up.

But then, the already miserable atmosphere was made worse when his phone screamed and vibrated under his rock-hard pillow. A phone call. He assumed it would be from his landlord, who would've then proceeded to throw a tantrum on a scale higher than ever before over the smallest of money owed. It was a cruel thought and one he would have given a kidney to avoid happening. The ringtone went on and prompted him to groan loudly in a mix of discomfort and grumpiness before reaching for it and picking him up. Though, to his surprise, pleasant or not, it was a call from his mother. This could've been worse than whatever he had previously thought of, but she deserved to hear from him. And so, very reluctantly he picked it up.

 "Asa, boy. Why won't you pick it up sooner? I know y'probably wan' to be left alone. But we need to talk about some'in'." 

She spoke in a very soft, almost sympathetic voice, which made him feel a sense of assurance whose credibility wasn't exactly set in stone. 

"Aye, Ma'." 

"My son, listen to me. It's 3 PM and y'sound like you jus' got out of bed. Why would ye do this to yerself?" 

"Ma! Ma, I know. I know I should be fixing myself and all but-"

She was not having any of his persuasive talk, laden with promises manufactured in cheap plastic, not anymore at least. And so, to Asa's dismay, the assurance was broken in only a few seconds."

Don'-Don't give tha' to me, boy! You always speak all ye wan' and you never work on anythin'! It's been like this for so long now that I can't even trust ye anymo'e..." 

The game of chess had just begun, the game with the goal of him calming her down once more. He'd been here many a time in the past, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to keep his real feelings away from her this time. 

"You know that's not true, Ma'. It's unfair for you to say that, if anythi-" 

He was interrupted, and the sudden raising of her voice sent a wave of panic through his body.

"I WAN'A HEAR NONE OF THAT! NONE OF IT. ZERO. NIL! Look at your kid brother Brennan, look at where he is no-" 

To gain control, Asa decided that interrupting the interrupter was the way to go, but he himself had already begun losing his composure. Of all the things someone could say to him, getting compared as a means to be degraded really got into Asa's head, especially if it was his younger brother Brennan. 

"-Don't bring Brennan into this. Don't do it. It's not fair-It's never fair i-" 

The interrupting competition continued, and it was his mother who struck again.