Heaven's On Fire |Dimebag Darrell

I Don't Even Recognize You Anymore

December 1st, 2004

The day of my appointment had finally come, and I was a nervous wreck. Darrell continued to keep his word, calling every day to check in on me. While I continued to withhold some important information from him. Each time my thoughts fell back on the baby, part of me grew just a little excited at the thought of having this child.

When I shared my fears to Rita, she assured me that no matter what, she was going to stand by me the whole way through. Hearing her support helped allow me to see a possible future with this baby. Especially since today was already taking on as a stressful day. A new issue of Warhammer was released for their December magazines, and guess who was interviewed...

Once the band had disbanded back in 03'. I had wished Phil the best in life as I followed Darrell's path that he set before us. 'But after reading in what I had just read, I am utterly disgusted and confused. I haven't had the opportunity to speak with Darrell about it just yet. I honestly cannot imagine what his reaction would be when his old band mate who was part of a brotherhood with him tells an interviewer that he "deserved to get your ass beat!"

And for what reason? Darrell hasn't spoken to Phil since they parted ways. We moved on with our lives, with well wishes towards both him and Rex. This was not the Phil I knew anymore. How could you throw away all those memories you had with these guys, and just speak about them as though they never meant a thing to you?

God I am so pissed. Rita couldn't believe what she was reading when I tossed the magazine into her lap. There were many moments where she had to talk me off the ledge in calling Phil to give him a piece of my mind.

Phil was a brother. How could he?

Truthfully, I didn't have the time to sit and ponder over it. I had an appointment to be at. While in the car, I had many thoughts running through my head. "So, have you thought in what you wanted to have? A boy or a girl?" Glancing over while she tried to drive. Today I got to be passenger princess because Rita didn't want me to put myself at risk. I could tell she was taking her job as auntie seriously.

I giggled to myself as I thought about it. "I really don't care. I guess what really matters to me is that the baby is alright. I am at least thankful that we had caught this pregnancy early on before I started fucking it up by drinking or smoking." Rita laughed. "That is very true," she agreed.

We reached the office where my appointment was held. Didn't take long to fill out paperwork and check in. The wait seemed like it went on forever, but I am sure it was only 15 minutes. "Sabian Abbott?" A nurse called out, smiling at me the moment I stood up. Rita stayed close behind while we made our way back. God, I was so nervous. I took up the table when the nurse went over my vitals and weight just before explaining that the Dr. would be in shortly.

The room had tons of pictures of pregnant women and babies; it was a bit overwhelming. Rita looked around, "what if you have twins?" Shocked, I stared at her hard. Was she out of her mind? "Shut the fuck up ass hole! What are you trying to do? Jinx me?" I whispered yelled. Rita just chuckled. Glad she found this entertaining. That woman was trying to stress me out. Shit, I just accepted the thought of having only one baby, singular, uno. Not even trying to entertain the thought of having two.

The Dr. finally walked in and went over my history with me. Askin what form of contraception we were using, so on and so forth. Once all questions were answered, she instructed me to remove both my pants and underwear before changing into one of their flimsy garments that was place out for me. This task only took me a minute even with Rita sitting and teasing me during the process. It was her way of trying to get me to loosen up. Worked a little.