I think I lost him

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The Present

Han's POV:

Messages: 

Han -- Did you get it?

M <3 -- yes. 

Han -- when?

M <3 -- Sometime ago.

Han -- thats great Congratulations.

M <3 -- I am hoping I get it for this week too. 

Han -- you will you will dont worry about it.

M <3 -- Thank you. 

Han -- Anytime.


I clicked on the messages again thinking there must be some more he might write. We had been friends for three months now. We were the closest people in the whole world but after the first month it went from "constantly being in touch" to "I'll call him tomorrow maybe". 

Why did this happen? First I know it was me who pulled back when I saw I didnt make him as happy as our other friends. Second, he confronted me twice but I am not ready to be someone's second. 

I am huge on friends. I love making them. But at the same time when it comes to getting close to someone I get testy, I get jealous, I get nervous, I get insecure and my worst trait? Yeah these are one of the nicest - I start to back off. 

For me having many friends is great but if I get that one best friend I wont look for more. I mean I will keep making friends and socializing but I would never ever think of replacing or hiding things from my best friend. Ofcourse even if its someone else's secret my best friend would be the first to find out. 

Want to know my best traits? I care, I care a lot, I treated him like my child, like my husband, like my world. He has always been my first priority. Even when things were dull, things were not good for me, things went haywire or things were great and perfect he was always the first person in my mind and many times the person next to me. And I treated him the same way......


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