used to love. | sunsun

prologue & ice box

USED TO LOVE.

The thing about loving you is
I can't tell if it's healing or destroying me.
...
They never tell you how fucking hard it is to fall out of love with someone.

WARNINGS; trauma, angst, mention of abuse.
TROPE; fluffy, angst, high school au
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sunoo - focus

"I can't believe I'm running this field with you, just because you were late this morning, Sunoo. You owe me something!", Yang Jungwon, my best friend, complained to me as we ran our second lap around this field, since we both arrived late to school today - thanks to my clumsy ass - while all the other students in our class were playing volleyball.

"Alright, I get it! It's my fault, so stop bickering now! I'll buy you tteokbokki after our lectures, okay?", I said out of breath, stumbling over almost every step I took.

The weather was still hot this August, making it harder for me to breathe.

"Sure whatever. I will literally kill you if you forget!", he said, "Can you believe it though? Two more years and we're free! Then we can finally get away from this place. Isn't that so exciting?", he asked while slowing down his speed, knowing I can't keep up with him.
I just nodded along, as I didn't have the stamina to answer the question. Beads of sweat were already running down my face as I wiped them off with my shirt.

After we finished our third lap, we took a little break on the bench. I was drenched in sweat as we watched some students play basketball now.

Our class remained the same after the summer holidays, except for Riki Nishimura, also known as Ni-ki, who switched to our class. Although he doesn't go to class that often as he spends most of his time practicing, he is very popular throughout our school as he is one of the five members of the Decelis basketball team. They are known for their passion for basketball and their incredible talent in their hobbies. Obviously the group that drives all the girls crazy just for their attractiveness while at the same time being cocky but who cares, they're hot.

Well, that's what Jungwon told me. I've never been interested in any other sport than dance or ice skating, so I didn't really care.

"Wow, he's really good." Jungwon said in awe.
"Have you signed up for a sport this year?" I asked, taking a sip of water.

For a brief minute he didn't answer my question but just ignored the eye contact. "Okay, don't freak out now, Sunoo" he broke the silence, looking at me with a nervous grin, "So... I signed up for basketball because I thought it would be great to practice something new."

"WHAT?", I shouted a little too loud. All the students' faces turned to me.

I didn't mind him joining a sports team, I really don't, but the fact that it's the basketball team the Decelis members play on was so annoying. Once you get there, all you will do is practice every day. I doubt that Jungwon can even walk after training.

"You did what now? Are you crazy?" I said, more quietly this time, so as not to draw attention.

"I told you not to freak out, dummy. It's not like I'm the only one signing up for it this year. Do you even know how hard it was to get in? I only got in because I did taekwondo as a kid and for my insanely good looking face, of course.. We didn't do anything last year, we should have some fun!"

"Listen, I do agree with you but still, are you sure you would even be able to brea-", before I could even finish my sentence, I felt a ball being thrown at my head. Ouch. It didn't feel like a hard throw, but the ball was hard enough to give me a headache for a while.

"Sorry, that wasn't my intention!" I turned and saw a tall good looking boy walking towards me.

He looked smart. Charming eyes. From what Jungwon told me it must be Lee Heeseung, the eldest of the five Decelis boys. "Are you all right? I'm sorry Jay threw the ball too hard..", he said looking into my eyes with a worried look on his face. He was indeed really attractive.

"I am fine, thank you."

"Oh hey, you're one of our new players, right? Hmm, Jersey number 04, Jungwon, isn't it?", another of them joined the conversation, slightly shorter than Lee Heeseung.

"You rembember me, Sunbaenim? It's a pleasure to meet you!", Jungwon said with as big smile formed on his face. He looked like he was about to faint.

"Sure thing, It's a pleasure to meet you too. Just call me Jay Hyung from now on. No need to be so formal in our club."

I looked to the field and only saw two Decelis members, Ni-ki and Jake, on the field. As far as I know there are supposed to be five, but I never found out who the fifth member was as he never attended class last year.

While the others were still having a conversation over basketball - since Jungwon was too intrigued and happy to shut up - I decided to do something nice and go get some more water, which was in a cooler on the other side of the field, so the boys can cool off too as they looked like they just got out of the shower instead of playing basketball.

I took slow steps across the field to lift the box to the bench, using my right hand to shield my face from the sun.

Crap.
I tried to lift the box again. 
Am I really that weak? Ridiculous. Fuck.

As I tried like an idiot I felt a presence behind me but I chose to ignore it and kept trying but that thing wasn't moving at all. My hands quickly turned red and imprints from the handle formed on my palm.

"Hurry up. Get out the way if you can't do it.", I heard an all too familiar voice say. It took me a moment to process it, and I turned to argue but then I saw those hazel eyes staring at the ice box. For a moment I thought my heart would explode from beating so fast. I felt like I had just run a whole marathon out of breath.

"Sunghoon hyung..?", was all that came out of my mouth. Almost inaudible.

I let go of the ice box to give him a warm hug as he dodged me, grabbing the ice box off the ground and carrying it over to the other guys who were already back on the field without even looking at me briefly.

I felt my heart sink.

what was that..?
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Just like that, our story begins anew, this time as strangers.