fall into me | GOJO x READER x SUKUNA |

♥one♥

  "y/n"?

  "y/n"! this voice keeps on calling to me.

...but it's not anyone i know. all i know is that it's aura is shrouded in unfamiliarity. just the slightest whisper from this voice is enough to make me tremble.

  "y/n"!  it calls again.

   "y/n, wake up"!

i spring off my bed in a jolt of fear. 'oh' i sigh as i let relief register on my face. it was just a dream. it was only my mom calling, though the voice in the dream was certainly not hers.

and they've been going on for much longer than a single night.

   "sweetie, are you ok...?, you were shaking in your sleep"! she holds onto my shoulders with both her hands, letting her nails grip into my skin. she must've been really worried.

   "mom... i'm fine", i say as i forcibly shrug her hands off of me.
"being touched after all of that isn't necessarily what i want right now"... i say as i sheepishly scratch the back of my head. it's almost as if those words i heard constantly vibrate through my body, lingering just too close for comfort.
"if you say so", she smiles and i suddenly forget about the tension pent up in my body. her warmth is contagious. "just know i'm always here to talk".
"of course you are, i'd be concerned if you weren't"! i roll my eyes playfully and we laugh. i don't know how long it's been since we stopped laughing. whenever dad died things kinda of stopped being like that.
we must've been thinking that same thing because when we catch ourselves laughing we almost immediately realize and awkwardly halt at at this standstill.
and just like that, the tension is back.
"well", i say as i collect myself and put my feet on the floor, "i'm gonna go get ready for"-
"wait". she abruptly says. the words came out in a hiss, her lips still pursed together like they've been glued.
"wait"... she says once again, bowing her head, trying to obscure her face; it didn't work. i could still see the tears falling from those reddened cheeks as clear as day.
"mom, don't force yourself, i don't even really wanna hear i—"
"just wait"!! she suddenly thrashes of the side of the bed where she was sitting like some kind of rag doll trying to walk. "i wanna say something, please, honey".
i instinctively step back, but that only made her want to pursue me more.
  i try to soothe. "mom, if it's about dad please don't do thi—"

it happened too fast for me to register. all of a sudden she was grabbing my wrists and profusely crying. i wriggle in resistance at first, but just seeing her face made me surrender any force or opposition against her. she was a wreck.
she drops to her knees once i stop trying to free myself and looks up at me. her face was the definition of what you think of when you hear the words "crocodile tears". i knew that his death was hard on her, but she was always trying to stay strong for me. she smiled when she didn't want to and bared her nicest war face amongst the moms of other graduating students. i've never seen her cry like this.

so none of it felt right. no matter how kind and loving my mom was, this was too uncharacteristically weird. call me paranoid, cruel, evil—or even plain old insane—but i knew something was wrong. i just need to get out for a while.

when she lets herself relax i quickly thrashed my wrists to break the softer grip she had on me. she almost immediately sprang after me in alarm, but i was faster with my head start. i shut the door, with only seeing her face for a brief second then the wall.

that brief second will haunt me for a long time. i would say for the rest of my life, but my life will most likely end before i have time to see that horrific expression—no—that thing lodged on her face in my nightmares. there was no expression. there was no soul. there was something else feeding off of her in its place.