Everything's gonna be okay

The man in the shadow

If you told me 3 years ago that I'll be obsessing over a barista I would've laughed at your face , It all started in one of those nights , not sleepy at a late time of night , everyone in the house is fast a sleep , the smell of wet grass after a rainy night , the sound of the cricket and our neighbours baby who woke up and cries. Nothing feels real at night , looking out my balcony to see that the road is empty, shops are closed no one's up it's just me and the world and that's what I crave , feeling alone , being alone but not lonely ,just by myself , I took my book to write but couldn't find the words , I used to be one of the best writers in my school but I didn't know that everything will disappear in a glimpse . Where did everything go ? Where are my thoughts, my words, my sentences ? How am I gonna be able to get back the old me? Maybe if I had the answer to these questions I wouldn't have been sitting in this balcony with rain pouring all over my body just to feel something but I don't , it feels like drowning in a deep sea and looking for something to hold on to so I can get to the ground again and walk but the only thing I see is a huge rock pushing me deeper and deeper .
It's been this way for over 1week now repeating the same thing every night , and waking up in the morning with 1 hour of sleep.

-I'll go for a walk maybe I'll get sleepy faster- I said

Leaving everything behind I sneaked out from the window and went down , I walked and walked for half an hour to find myself in front of a coffee shop I didn't even know existed before , I made a little space for me on the sidewalk and bumped into a motorbike , didn't feel anything but drowned in tears , I used to believe that tears only make us weak well I was raised into thinking that way  so maybe the reason of me crying now is being far from home .I closed my eyes , and cried without thinking about anything else.

-Hey-a deep, lower pitched voice

I froze. A lot of questions were turning in my mind but as soon as I stood up without moving my head I ran , I never ran this fast before but I can say that I was scared and frightened , even though I was running , the street where this happened seemed really long I couldn't find the end of it , taking a last look behind me , all I saw was a black shadow standing still with a charismatic posture with brown hair, I guess , and his clothes were all black but I couldn't distinguish his face in the dark , the street light wasn't helping though.
I don't remember how I did make  it to the house but as soon as I did I took a hot shower and laid in my bed , I laughed; the walk really did it's job the only thing I want to do now is to sleep , I finally closed my eyes after days of insomnia but the man in the shadow didn't leave my mind , who was it ? and why didn't he followed me , he could've caught me but he didn't, why ?
I closed my eyes.