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Chapter 24 - Feelings and decisions

Fiza felt her world shatter before her eyes as she watched Alan and Anna kissing; Anna on his lap, her arms around his neck, his hands on her waist, their lips entwined with fervent emotion. It felt as though her chest had been hollowed out, her heart ruthlessly trampled upon.

The pain was unbearable, leaving her gasping for air, struggling to process the reality of what she just witnessed. In that moment, she knew that she had lost Alan forever, and the realization pierced her soul.

Stunned and dazed, Fiza stood motionless, her face drained of color, her heartache consuming her. Alan and Anna broke apart, but Alan remained seated, trapped by Anna's presence on his lap. Anna continued to stroke his thigh intimately.

Fiza's anguished gaze met Alan's for a fleeting moment before she turned on her heels and fled.

Alan saw the pain on Fiza's face and he recognized the need to go after her. He turned to her, his voice pleading for understanding. "I need to go talk to her."

However, Anna remained curled up on his lap stroking his hair. "You have feelings for her," she stated matter-of-factly, refusing to budge.

Alan nodded "I'm really sorry. I tried," he began, his voice laden with sincerity and regret.

She slowly rose from his lap and pierced him with a sharp gaze, her words dripping with disdain. "You think chasing after her will make a difference? She'll see right through you," she scoffed with the same harshness of Aarthy's earlier accusations. "You don't need to pretend to care. People can see right through you."

Alan stood frozen, his old insecurities rooting him to the spot. He had tried harder than he ever had before, to make things work with Anna but she had confirmed his worst fears. He would never be good enough for anyone. There was something wrong inside him that made him unlovable.

Fiza ran, her thoughts racing alongside her pounding footsteps. The realization hit her with a forceful blow- Alan had never truly loved her, not in the way she had yearned for. He had made it clear from the beginning that emotional attachments were not his domain. Their physical intimacy had always existed in a separate realm, devoid of the depth she had craved.

She had willingly crossed boundaries, allowing herself to believe that their connection ran deeper than Alan's initial disclaimers.

He had stuck around though, hadn't he? He had always seemed happy to be around her. Yet, now she questioned her own judgment. Had he only been there for her out of a sense of obligation, masquerading as friendship?

Her tears mingled with the sweat on her face, mirroring the turbulence within her heart. She continued to run, her feet carrying her past familiar landmarks-the basketball court where they had spent countless hours, the girls' hostel and the lovers lane.

Unable to bear the weight of her shattered dreams any longer, Fiza sprinted onto the main road, her destination unknown. All she knew was that she couldn't stay within the confines of the campus that held memories of their failed connection.

Anna finally left the jam room, bitterly ending the only real relationship he had ever been in.

Though Alan had planned to end it, the level of dissatisfaction that Anna expressed still stung in his ears. He swallowed hard.

"You were the worst boyfriend I've had," Anna spat out, her voice dripping with frustration. "I was literally bored on our dates, waiting for them to end."

Alan felt a pang of guilt and confusion. He had believed he put in effort to make their relationship enjoyable. He had taken her dancing, bowling, and to the movies, trying to create memorable experiences together. He had been attentive and respectful, holding doors for her, offering to pick her up and drop her off, and paying for their dates. He had done everything he knew how, to make her happy.