Arranged for Life

The check up (part-2)

He pressed on my abdomen in different places. And then over my uterus and other reproductive organs.
Me feeling bad and shivering as I still have teeny tiny pricks of hair growing over my pubic area as I'm afraid of waxing over there and he is touching over it without any expression of eww on his face. It's like it's completely neutral. He's only concentrated on it.
Aah he's a good doctor by not commenting on it.

"Sweets, everything seems normal till now. But a deeper check would be required. I know you're young but it's important to keep checks in between. I'll just listen to your bowel movements and then proceed onto the next part"

He put his stethoscope back on and listened my belly.

"Okay sounds normal. Just your nerves are making you feel uncomfortable.. so now what do you want to get done with first?"

"Do I get an option?"

"Yes. We can go at your pace and whatever you're comfortable with.."

"What all is remaining?"

"Umm to be honest.. a lot. I've got to check your lymph nodes, breast, your vagina, uterus and tubes, and other things down there. Then for bones and reflex, and skin and muscles, and some basic tests..."

A whimper escaped me again. I am about to cry. He will see my body this way. And gynac test sounds scary and painful. I'm scared he won't like my body, he won't find me beautiful. All the words everyone said to me are coming back to me. I'll again be considered useless and he may end up being stuck with me, so he won't be living happily. And all the while he kept rubbing my palms but the traitorous tear fell down.

"I'm sorry I'm a crybaby"

"You're not. I know it's too much. If you are not at all comfortable then we can skip some parts. As for your blood sample, I won't be doing it now, I'll take it early morning tomorrow before you eat something and same goes for your urine sample. We will do one thing. Any one thing you want to get it done with. Rest we can do later. It's alright. I know I am stubborn and strict but it's the second day of our marriage and I can't have you to cry. It makes me feel bad, like am I that bad, I did not mean to hurt you. I'm just.. even I can't help it. It's my insecurity that I'm scared of losing you. This makes me go total like why am I doctor. I should be taking care of my family and prevent anything that can go wrong. I want to know you. Like not just the normal way. But knowing your body, knowing each and every nook and corner, the way it works, the way it keeps you alive and working, to keep it intact and safe. I know I'm not making any sense at all."

"You are making sense to me. I'm too scared of loosing you. I'm afraid of things I can't tell you yet."

"Please just one more thing for today of your choice and then rest. We'll talk about well you never initiated any thing so till the time you'll think about what and where to start sweets. Now tell me which one. Or should I dive right in. Although I want to dive right in but I'll wait for you, huh I don't know how long I'll be able to."

"Huh. No don't worry you can check me up. I'm scared but there's nothing to lose right. I'm sorry in advance if you don't like me after that and also sorry but if you'd want to leave me, I'll allow you-"

"Shhhhhh. What on earth are you talking about. Did I not tell you, even in your or mine or anyone's dreams or nightmares am I ever going to leave you. You're stuck with me for this and next seven lives of ours. And in so many ways you'll know later. Now just tell me which thing to do right now"

" Umm can we skip-" "Noppppe. Just one thing. Or you'll have to do something"

"What will I have to do"

"You really wanna know?" I nodded.

"Kiss me. On my lips"

"Uh. Can we just do reflex. Not the bones. Just reflex please."