Shu Sakamaki's Appetite

Imagine

You only hear your heart pounding in your chest in the silence as he looks down at you.
A slow, cold feeling of dread was creeping up your spine. Was he really going to stop now?
Had you really forgotten what he was like?!
Just as you were starting to curse yourself, he pulls up your face again to meet his eyes.
"Do you imagine about this often?" He asks so seriously, yet his eyes are still soft.
You carefully nod. All these 'dreams' always include him and even before these realistic ones began, you dreamed of being in his arms like this.
He moves closer slowly, his eyes drifting from yours to your lips and back again. "What if.." he whispers, "What if I can't protect you?"
In that very moment Shu looked worried, confused and just venerable. You had never seen him make such an expression.
An expression that made your heart melt and ache.
Your hand reaches up and strokes his cheek carefully, "Shu?"
What was he on about?
Why the sudden change?
His beautiful blue eyes grew weak and sad.
You couldn't help but just press your lips to his after his silence, sensing he just couldn't answer right now. The kiss melted your whole body, it was so tender and he gently deepens it so it lasts longer.
You both hear a clash and voices and spring up from your place. You glance back up at Shu and he looks so regretful. And it all fades to a fuzzy warm blackness.

"Ah~ Bitch Chan is already here."
"Pancake is only here for yours truly!"
You groan and look up, your head had been slumped in your arms.
No! Not again! How even?!
Your eyes just instantly filled with tears, all the brothers were now sat eating breakfast, except Shu. They all looked at you, wondering what on earth you were doing.
"Bitch-chan...?"
You just couldn't move. So many feelings were overwhelming you.
Shu finally comes into the dining room, slumping in his seat, the whole time avoiding any eye contact with anyone. He stabs at his food. No emotions, nothing. Once again...
You push yourself up carefully from your chair and table, stumbling towards the door.
"Huh? Did Shu go too rough with her?" You hear Laito murmuring to his brothers.

You didn't want to lock yourself up in your room again, so you made your way to the rose garden and perched on the edge of a bench over looking the pond.
You've probably lost your mind. Maybe this was your brains way of coping with your current situation. The trauma was too much so it made up nice scenarios just to make you happy for a while.
Confusion racked your head, turning it into a powerful migraine. You held your head in your hands.
Even when you had tried to take control of the situation each time you had landed into a deeper pit. These mind games hurt, they broke your soul and hurt your heart.
Maybe this was just the Sakamaki mansion way.
You feel like your in this deep dark hole, and you just can't escape.
Tired, just so tired from it all..

Laying on the bench, staring up at the stars, you remember Ayato bragging about their childhood, there was something about Shu, fighting polar bears, and having a secret human friend. And a fire... in a village. Oh yes. It was all linked.
But how did it link to you now? And was you even going to try caring about this? Just two seconds ago you had given up!
You had a tragic childhood too! Your mother on her deathbed told you to be strong and always do what you wanted to do in life. Yet here you were crying over a boy again! Even if you were a helpless human in a house full of powerful vampires... you sigh, wow, how your life had changed.
You sit up and take a deep breath, starting to relax and renew yourself. Out of the corner of your eye you see a figure shifting closer.
"Don't bother!" You say suddenly, even surprising yourself.
On closer inspection you see the glint of blonde and blue. And your heart starts stammering all over again.
"I can't do whatever you're doing Shu." You manage to get out, "It's confusing and it hurts! Even more than just you taking my blood!"
Angry tears formed, yet a slow relief washes over you.