the 1

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I wake up in the morning, and before the sun shining through my tiny basement windows can even hit my eyes, I think of her. I sit up in my bed, wiping my eyes of the crusted tears from the painful night before. I can still smell her all over my room, all over me, even though the last time I had seen her was days ago. I wish I could forget, erase my memories. Then maybe I could move on from this mess I have caused. It's hard to forget when our lives were so intertwined, every living second is a reminder that she's no longer mine and I am no longer hers. I look around my room, everything has a trace of her, my bedsheets smell like her, my tv stand still holds her hair tie from the last time she was here, and my shoes are still on the floor in the same spot I kicked them off, reminding me of the last time I saw her. This was only two days ago, however it feels like an eternity when my days consist of waking up, going to work, coming home to shower, and then back to bed. It sounds depressing, but I would rather sit at home and think of her, rather than live a life acting like i'm happy. So, here's the story of us, how we grew together, made memories together, planned a future together, and then I fucked it all up, and here we are now.