Then the entire band of Radiohead™ teleport right in front of you!!
Thom Yorke, the lead singer starts stomping all over the pretty petunias and shoving them up his ass😱😱
"Wtf" you say
"Why are you cutting those flowers?" Colin Greenwood the Bassist asks
Jonny Greenwood the Lead Guitarist just stares at you like this
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Thom stops stomping on the flowers and shoving them up his ass
Ed o brien from radiohead also is like "Thom wtf why were you shoving flowers up your ass"
"I was reading this informative cooking book called greep and the cheesecake and he-"
At this point you decide to answer colon's question
"Because they are pretty"
Suddenly Thom scampers over to you with lightning speed on all fours
He gazes into your beautiful orbs like this
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"But...I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren't 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺"
Phil.
Thom picks you up to take you to the Radiohead™ hype house because you are very petite but falls over and gets a concussion because he's even smaller so ed just does it instead and carries you over to the official RADIOHEAD™ vehicle. It's not a car... just some kind of unidentifiable vehicle.
"Oh btw none of us know how to drive LMAO" says Colin so you end up in the drivers seat with Thom next to you much to your annoyance
You are driving through the British countryside and get to a really hilly area.
Thom hasn't been bothering you so far because he fell asleep due to really bad constipation (I wonder why)
You hope it stays that way
Once you get near the top of the mountain he wakes up!!
Luckily Cloin distracts him and says
"Hey Thom you know that one fanfic where I like beat you up a lot let's recreate that"
"Ok bbg"
So Thom swivels around and they start play fighting but Thom is either a really good actor or he's actually enjoying it which weirds Column out so he stops which makes Thom bored
Here's the car layout btw
He gets really bored so he starts trying to play fight with you but you are driving on a fucking cliff and it makes you swerve off of it
"You flinched🥺🥺"
"OF COURSE I FUCKING FLICHED WE DROVE OF A FUCKING CL-"
"Does he hit you?🥺🥺🥺"
In that split second, you think about your really shitty abusive marriage and how things could've been different if you had just ran away with Maxmilliom Kolombino during that trip to Nicaragua in your early 20s...
In that same split second you both had a big fat smooch and it was a really slobbery wet kiss!
Then the car crashed into the very hard rocky ground and exploded into about 10 massive flaming pieces and everyone died instantly except Phil and Jonny who were in the back compartment thing and died of suffocation earlier since they weren't gay enough to try circular breathing
