Camryn Quinn is finally getting what she wants...sort of. Moving into a dorm and away from her not so supportive father is a good first step, but like everything with him, it comes with strings. She must attend the college of his choosing for at lea...
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My eyes dart open at the sound of my alarm, a groan escapes my throat. There is no way it's been ten minutes already. I avert from hitting snooze again and roll myself out of bed. Alyssa is still snoring so I do my best to be quiet and grab my shower caddy before leaving the room.
My extra snooze this morning accompanied by my lack of clean clothes has me behind. I pride myself on my ability to plan, so running late on the first day of classes feels like a bad omen.
Slipping into the only clean pants I have and an oversized t-shirt leaves me with just enough time to grab my backpack and make a coffee. Even with my rushing, I let myself pause for a few seconds to find the portrait on my desk. My mom and I the summer before she passed away, during a trip we took just the two of us. Twin smiles filling our faces, her arms wrapped tightly around my shoulders.
I haven't let myself do it in recent weeks. It's hard enough to know that every new chapter in my life will always have a void without opening the grief back up to really think about what it means. For a while I hoped my dad would figure out some way to fill it. Maybe he tried when he met Katie, but a new girlfriend who could be my older sister wasn't exactly an ideal way to try to move on as a family. Most of the time Callan and I just pretend she doesn't exist.
But on a day like today, I just really wish I could call her. First days have always been something I dreaded. We moved so much in the beginning of my dad's career. I started at a new school every few years, and I've never exactly had an easy time making new friends. My mom would say it was because I possessed a sharpness that the other kids just didn't understand. Gabi would say I've just crafted my bitchiness.
I'm older now, sure, but having to put myself out there still feels vulnerable. I still hate it enough that I should just register for all online classes and avoid human interaction completely. It's why going to Vanderbilt with Gabi didn't seem like such a big deal. She's always been the more social one, and I've never had a problem just tagging along.
From her bed, Alyssa mumbles something about the acidity in coffee and stained teeth which I take as my cue to leave. But not before bringing a finger to my mouth and pressing a kiss to give to the only version of my mom I have left.
🏈🏈🏈
"And now that we have made it through introductions, we can move on to the syllabus which you can find under this course in Blackboard," My biology professor announces to the class.
I'd normally prefer a hard copy of a syllabus to reference weekly when planning out my to-do list, but considering I read the one she posted a week ago, I gladly take the chance to play around on my laptop for the remainder of the class. Reaching into my backpack I search for the cold smooth metal of my Macbook, but all I'm met with is the nylon and built-in foam of my backpack.
I knew my backpack felt too light this morning. I instead pull my phone out, replying to Gabi's text and then check my email. Only one new one is waiting for me. I scan it just as the professor brings up the attendance policy.
