Can I Go Where You Go? - Pablo Gavi

Morning Sickness

2030 World Cup training prior to the semi-final match vs Uruguay

I bolt off the pitch in the direction of the trash can, leaning over it just in time. I can't hold in the vomit anymore as I let it spill into the trash can.

I hear the quick clicks of cleats on cement behind me before feeling a hand on my shoulder.

"Are you alright?" Gavi asks me, rubbing my shoulder, moving the fabric of my training kit.

I nod, wiping my mouth with my hand and spitting one last time into the trash can before turning around to face my husband. Upon seeing my face he takes a few side steps towards the bench, grabs a water bottle and hands it to me.

"Thanks," I say, taking a sip from the bottle.

When I'm done Gavi gently takes hold of my chin and lifts my face to look at him. "Are you sure you're okay?" he asks, searching my eyes. "This is the third morning in a row you've thrown up during training."

"I'm fine," I reassure him, same as I have every other morning. It's odd, I don't feel sick or out of the ordinary until suddenly I feel like I need to puke. Then, after I get it out I'm good to go back to training.

I throw my water bottle down near the bench and start for the field again. Gavi catches my hand, pulling me back to face him. "You're not okay, this isn't normal. Maybe you should see the team doctor," he suggests.

I shake my head. Absolutely not. If I see the team doctor something could be wrong with me and then I might not be able to continue playing in the World Cup. "I feel fine," I tell him. "It's probably side effects from going off birth control." I'd been on birth control since I was a teenager, but when the World Cup schedule came out it turned out I was supposed to be on my period during it. Being at that stage in my cycle would have made me tired, weaker and at more risk of injury during such a high level competition, so I talked to my medical specialist and since we had so much time before the World Cup she suggested we manipulate my cycle. Apparently the way we did it wasn't damaging in anyway, but it did mean I had to go off my birth control. I decided it was worth it since Gavi and I had decided we wanted to start trying to have kids after the World Cup, deeming it as good a time as any. That being said up until now we have been very careful to use protection so I don't get pregnant before the World Cup ends.

"Isla," Gavi pleads, "I just want you to be alright. I know you've worked harder then anyone to be here, but I can't bare the thought of you getting hurt."

I'm about to argue how every day is a danger in our line of work, one miss timed tackle and it could all be over. And then I realize something. "What day is it?" I ask Gavi, furrowing my eyebrows and trying to count the days in my head.

His eyebrows furrow. "The 18th, we have our semi-final match on the 20th in two days."

I start trying to do the math in my head. "And what day did we win our first match?"

An even more confused Gavi responds, "I'm not sure, two, two and a half weeks ago. We can look at a calendar when training is over."

I look up at him, my expression uncertain. "Pablo," I hesitate, if I say this out loud it's out there, even if it turns out not to be true, "I think I might be pregnant."

His face freezes in surprise. "Wha--"

"I don't know, it's just a thought, I mean morning sickness," I gesture to the trash can, "and I'm not on birth control anymore. I haven't taken a test yet, so I could be making this up--"

"But we've been careful," he says.

I bite my lip. "Yeah, except that one night, when we won our first match." After we won our first match we had several days before our second so the team went out to a bar. I've gotten more comfortable drinking these past years, but still I do not drink often. Gavi and I had a good night and got very drunk. When the party wrapped up we went back to our hotel room and although the details are blurry---and maybe it's because it would make my need to throw up during morning practices make sense---it's not far fetched to assume we forgot protection.