Sleepwalk

Burn it up

"...What I mean, is", Jimin swallowed the remains of the pastry down he was devouring messily "that you may change your searching profile."

Taehyung dunked his teabag the millionth time into his hot water, stopping his movement "What's wrong with it?"

"Yeah, what's wrong with it?" Yoongi shot in, his coffee almost empty.

Jimin raised his eyebrows

"'Two gays looking for a fellow gay to room with'? Please, that is too much 'gay' in one sentence."

"We just want to make our search field clear", Yoongi rolled his eyes.

"Besides, it's your fault we are this miserable. You ditched our sacred gay den."

Jimin snorted over Taehyung , almost slipping from the chair.

"Yeah, sorry that I don't want to live with you two fucks for the rest of my life. Didn't know we were in a poly relationship."

"Eww, Park Jimin! Don't put images into my mind!"

Yoongi was always overdramatic.

"I am very happy with Joon. But I try to help you two."

"By corrupting our morals?"

"By opening your horizon. What's wrong with living with a hetero? Huh? That's heterophobe if you'd ask me."

"Nah, that won't go well."

"Because you two are too horny? You could still fuck with each other."

Yoongi almost spilled his coffee over the table, choking and coughing

"You are crossing lines dude."

"I still wonder how you didn't yet."

"Excuse me, only because you made out once with Tae when you were drunk doesn't mean I have to do it too. Besides, he's my bro, my homie, nah, that's just really not sexy at all, sorry Tae, as handsome you are, you know I could never. And did it slip your mind that I have a boyfriend??? Yeah, nah."

Taehyung rolled his eyes "Why do we even have to discuss now me and Yoongi fucking?! We have a serious problem here! If we don't find a roommate in a month we won't be able to keep the apartment!"

"Then change the search profile."

"Into what?"

"Two Bro's searching another bro to room with."

"That is too many bro's in one sentence."

Jimin chuckled "that's what I was saying. But I think you really need to consider to live with non-gays too."

"'non-gays', I felt my gut churn."

"Don't be so overdramatic!"

"The last hetero we had to deal with wanted to turn us!"

"Yeah, because she thought you are hot. A woman. Hetero guys would never do that."

"He has a point."

Taehyung sighed, covering his face in his hands.

"Not all hetero guys are assholes. They can be pretty chill with living with two homo's."

"Did you just..."

Jimin laughed out loud.

"Just try it."

Taehyung looked over to Yoongi with unsure eyes, a pained expression almost.

"Alright, we are gonna try it."

****

Taehyung and Yoongi made a neat list of things they would ask those who applied for being their roommate.