Summary: Colby can't live without Sam.
Type: Angst.
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OOO
T.H.I.R.D
OOO
Colby's tears slowly fell onto the pillow, the lingering smell of Sam still in the sheets. Colby tried snuggling deeper into Sam's hoodie, trying to smell and feel the love he once had. He had sobbed for days, the image of Sam lurking beneath his mind as he tried to forget. He didn't want to live with this pain. He didn't want to live with the thoughts, the thoughts of death lingering before his eyes.
But he couldn't give up.
He promised Sam. He promised him that he'd never do the same. Sam pulled the trigger in front of him, Colby watching his brain and fresh scatter against the walls as blood covered his face. It was terrifying. Colby cried, sobbed, screamed, shouted, and broke throughout an hour. His heart shattered just the same as Sam's skull.
Colby didn't want to live without him. Colby wanted the image of Sam's death out of his head, wanting to remember Sam's good days and not his last. He wished to feel Sam's body against him, wishing to cuddle up against Sam's chest once more. He missed his voice, his eyes, his skin, his laugh, his hands, his chest, his hair, and of course, his love.
Colby couldn't live without his love.
Colby needed Sam for himself to be okay. Because without Sam, he was nothing. Colby didn't feel the same without him. Sam was a part of Colby. Now, Sam was missing. Colby was missing a piece of him, the piece that completed his happiness. Colby no longer had such an emotion, happiness no longer existed to him.
Everyone tried to help Colby, everyone tried to help him become himself again. Of course, they failed. The only way Colby could ever be the same is if Sam was back, if Sam was still alive and well Colby could be okay. But, he wasn't. Sam wasn't alive or well as he was no longer on this earth.
Colby didn't even tell the fans, his pain too deep to even bring up the subject. He failed to smile, he failed to laugh, he failed to feel something rather than pain, but he succeeded to cry, to sob, and to feel like nothing else mattered. Colby felt nothing but pain, the ache in his heart too deep to ignore.
Colby got up from bed, looking at the same gun that Sam used. Slowly, Colby picked the gun up, placing it against his head as tears fell from his face. He smiled once more, the same old tears trailing down as he looked up to the sky.
"I can't live without your love, Sam..."
He can't live without Sam's love.
He won't live without Sam's love...
...He will pull the trigger.
