South Park Oneshots

(Tyde) No homo ❤️

Yep. Time to try some smut stuff.
Also does anyone else think of tide pods when they see this ship : /
Ahem....Daddy kink
Clyde: 18
Tolkien: 19
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Clyde POV:
"You guys are so gross"
Tweek and Craig have been dating since 4th grade and right now we were in Tolkien's house having a sleepover and the two lovebirds were flirting like crazy

"Fuck off Clyde, I saw you and Tolkien the other day."
"What?" Tolkien and I say in sync
Craig smirks and says
"You two were holding hands, it was kinda gay"
"Says you asshole"
"I don't know what your talking about"
As he turns to continue making out with his boyfriend

Tolkien turns to look at me
"Clyde, wanna help me set up stuff in my room?"
"Yeah sure dude"
We get up and walk away to his bedroom

"If I hear moaning, I will gladly fuck Tweek right here and now on your couch"
"CRAIG!"
"Babe I won't actually, it's just a joke"

We go in his room and close the door
"Craig is such a dick sometimes"
Tolkien says to me as he sits on his bed
"Yeah, sometimes"

I lay down next to him

"Weren't we supposed to be doing something?"

Tolkien looks over and scoffs
"I just wanted to get away from that"
I giggle and I see a pink tint go across his face
"You okay dude?"
He looks away
"Y-yeah I'm fine"
I just shrug it off, not thinking much of it

We sit in silence for a while before Craig opens the door
"Tweek and I are gonna go pick up some pizza"
I sit up and Craig smirks

"What's going on in here, hm?"
I blush madly
Craig knows how I feel about Tolkien and he always teases me about it but he promised not to tell Tolkien

"Nothing dude just go ahead. Maybe Tweek will suck your dick while your driving if your flirty enough"
"Good idea man"
"I wasn't being serious dumbass!"
And he was already gone

"Oh my god"
Tolkien facepalms as I start laughing

He lays down and I do the same next to him
He takes out his phone and starts scrolling through TikTok

After about 5 minutes he sits up and puts away his phone

"Clyde can we talk?"
I sit right next to him and pull my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them
"Yeah, what's up man?"

He sighs and looks into my eyes
"No homo dude but your freaking adorable"
I blush even more than I did before
Did my crush just call me adorable!? Holy fuck am I dreaming??

I just stare at him blankly with a red face

"Y-you..think I'm..adorable?"
He frowns
"Yeah, sorry if I made things weird"

"No, no. I uh... I think your cute too"

We look at each other, neither of us saying anything
We slowly lean in, he cups my face with his hand and closes the gap
His lips are so soft, this is the best kiss I've ever had
He pulls me onto his lap and continues to make out with me

We break apart
"That was amazing" he says smiling
"Yeah" I agree

"No homo though? Just a typical best friend thing, right?" he nervously smiles
I frown though
"Yeah.. No homo"

"AY BITCHES COME DOWNSTAIRS!- Oh shit sorry babe, too loud? I'm so sorry baby!"

I chuckle and get off of Tolkien walking to the door, but Tolkien grab my hand
"Can we talk about this later dude?"
"Yeah sure Tolkien"