Not quite there yet

~People...

I see Pandora help the boys as per usual. I see her look over at me ever few minutes. I start to write in my poetry book. Writing is one of my favourite things to do. I write to escape reality. I read to escape reality. Then Pandora comes over too me just as I finish the first stanza of my poem.

"Pandora, I promise you I'm okay" I say looking her in the eyes trying to convince her I'm okay. She can see I'm not. She has always been able to see through my lies. "Reggie, may I have a look at your poem?" She smiles warmly as she looks at me.

The thing I love about Pandora is she asks. Evan and Barty would of snatched the book away and looked at it with permission. Pandora always asks permission for everything.

"I wouldn't advise you do, Pandora" I say as I close the book. I can see a slight feeling of disappointment in her eyes but she hides it with a smile. "Oh. That's okay, Reggie" i see her smile warmly.

"Pandora" I hear Evan call. She looks over to him and glances back at me. "Seems like one of my grown babies needs my help" she says in a joking tone of voice. She used to call us that when we were younger.

Her three grown babies. It was always a joke. She always acted as though she was our older sister of our mother. Especially too Evan. He seems too want a figure like that the most.

I suppose me and Evan have the worse upbringing out of us all. Both of our parents part of.....the deatheaters. My parents have treated me absolutely horrible. But at the end of the day they are still my parents so....I suppose....I love them.

I used to love sirius too. Back when he was just my older brother. Back when me and sirius would hide in our wardrobes laughing at three in the morning. Back when we would clean eachothers wounds inflicted by our parents. Back when he used to tell me 'We will escape together, Reg. I promise. Its me and you against the world.'

It always had been me and sirius against the world. But he found his friends. He escaped.....without me. So I have to stay too insure his safety. He found a family. A found family.

The Smart blonde boy. Remus Lupin, had been nice too me. Me and remus used to meet up occasionally for studying. Then there is the sporty boy, James potter. He was tolerable..I suppose. Then the small one, Peter Pettigrew. He is okay I suppose

I used to miss sirius being there for me and being a good brother. Now I'm glad he's gone. He's surrounded by such nice people but he's turned into a absolute dirt-bag.