Spencer watched from the window as the valley fell into dusk, and dusk deepened into night. She had known the wranglers were still up, but she didn't have it in her to go deal with them. Who was she to dampen their liveliness?
She knew Rip was wrestling awake on the bed, she knew he'd probably tell her to rest before they helped move everyone to the camp. But every time she closed her eyes, she'd see them.
It was different every time. Sometimes it was Rip, sometimes Kayce, even Sawyer made an appearance. But the one that had forced her to wake, time after time... was Tate. Too late- much too late- she would try to stop herself from shooting. Moving her hand, aiming the gun somewhere else. But it always landed where she promised.
And she couldn't fix it. Every night a new face, every morning... a new problem.
"Darling?" Rip's voice was thick with sleep, his words heavy and slow. Spencer turned to look at him, a guilty smile on her face.
She knew how much her hurting was hurting him, but she couldn't pull herself together. Not enough to fix it.
"Sorry honey," she whispered as she crawled over the sheets to sit next to him.
A slow smile spread across Rip's face as he tucked her hair behind her ear. He didn't miss how she leaned into his hand, keeping him from moving away. Not that he ever would.
"I'm just worried about you, I know you gotta do it all on your own time. But it doesn't make me worry any less."
Spencer smiled, nodding her head as she blinked hard to keep her eyes dry. "I know, I just- they don't stop."
The nightmares. Rip had learned only the week before what had been pulling Spencer from her sleep every night, leaving her worn down in the morning. Before he could respond, more shouts and cheers came from the bunkhouse.
"I'll go deal with them, you go back to sleep," Spencer practically pleaded with Rip.
He huffed but nodded, unable to fight against the wobble in her voice as she stood. Once her jeans were on, she turned and kissed him once, mumbling an 'I love you' and heading down to the bunkhouse. Each step she took, she let the concerns of the night fade away, briefly filling the cracks in her heart to be herself once again.
The door slammed open, the commotion in the bunkhouse coming to an abrupt halt. Guilty looks shot to the door to see a pissed off Spencer standing in the doorway.
"It's three in the fucking morning and you fuckers are drinking?"
She was calm, so calm Ryan was ready to run scared as he tried to stammer out a reason. But Spencer's glare turned to him, shutting him up promptly.
"You," her finger wagged in his face. "Your girlfriend has been gone for less than a day and you're already acting like a damn idiot! And I don't give a shit she's been traveling all day, she'll lay a new one on you too."
YOU ARE READING
Sunshine
Fanfiction~sequel to Darling~ There was peace in Spencer's life at last. With a wedding to be planned, a home to decorate, and a ranch to run, everything was finally beginning to fall into place. But when the world outside Bozeman closes in once again, she mu...