𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 𝐁𝐘 𝐀 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐀𝐃𝐄

𝐗𝐗𝐗𝐈𝐕 - 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐞

In hard moments, excitement, delectation, and the peace one derives from the little things such as watching humans just being humans or listening to a loved one passionate about something deemed prodigious. Happiness deserts and jilts you. Contentment becomes a stranger.

Today makes it a month since abduction. A month since my last smile.

I get fired up with a burst of hope every time Adriano sends a distraction to Javier but I could only wonder how he always knows the right moments to do so. I fear he's leaving me halfway. I fear he has no plans to save me and if he did what was taking him so long?

I tell myself to be patient, to not let the hope die down but every day, my parents and I are met with harsh conditions. We live like slaves to our own relation. We get by on barely anything but never complain, we can't. We don't fight them or form a resistance but yet we are handled roughly, painfully.

We are beat up.

We are whipped.

A thousand marks against our skin as proof.

How could being alive hurt so much?

Many people here have been for months. I'm filled with sorrow when I see the others, the look on their faces, the true definition of despair. We all have the battle marks from the whip as something similar.

We didn't get to see the others very often. We saw them when we were being hauled and dragged to the cafeteria for our only meal for the day -which wasn't much or even tasteful but you get used to it eventually- and we ate with them and made small talk before we're taken back to our room.

An iota of serenity brushes my insides at the fact I hadn't been met with the unpleasant company of my uncle in a week. My chest feels lighter and lighter because, in the past few days, I've been left to just exist.

Not for him.

Not for myself.

To just exist.

And it felt marvelous. It wasn't peace but it was close, a distant cousin. But it felt nice. It was a good escape.

Nonetheless, it was an escape I should fear. It wasn't leading me to tranquility, it was leading me to greater danger and that I knew well from experience. When my uncle would come for me, he would come merciless. Whenever my uncle took extended periods he came back starved and when starved, nothing would stop him. Not even Adriano.

I feared that happening but I knew it would. My uncle was going to have his way the next time and he wouldn't be getting distracted. Not even if someone walked in and shot me dead, he would kill the person and fuck my dead body and even my lifeless-self would resist him.

He was going to have me and I was going to face all the anger from the past month and the distractions like I never have. There would be no more running or hindering. The walls of my life will fall in his hands as I knew it.

When the doors creaked open and my uncle shoved his head in it, his face painted with that queasy smile, I'm frightful I had avowedly summoned him. It felt like my thoughts had been transferred straight to his mind and he has come to take away the cousin to peace from me just like he always shoved and forced away everything that gave me a modicum of delight from my hands.

Upon seeing him my parents who had their eyes closed, seemingly meditating or resting were suddenly alert.

My uncle just stood there, staring and smiling at me for what felt like a melancholic eternity before he finally spoke to his guards. "Get her in my room now," he commanded, then turned on his heels and was gone.