It's Murder at the Buy-Right

8

The drive to the Buy-Right was surprisingly nice. Daisy Ann once again found her dour mood dissolving. The rolling hills, filled with hardwood trees and tan and blue-green meadow grasses, were a kaleidoscope of color. Light and dark greens blended with the tapestry of the Carolina blue sky. The bright yellow sun kissed every surface with a soft, warm glow. 

There were several turns in the road that afforded a misty view of the foothills of the Appalachians to the west. Smoky and blue, their gently sloping ridges populated the skyline, looking exactly as they had for thousands of years.

How small and insignificant the problem of her ill-fitting outfit suddenly became.

She pulled up to the store.

Something was wrong.

This was Deke's day to open up. The inside of the Buy-Right was as dark as a tomb. The door was still locked. She found her key. She didn't understand. She looked a second and a third time to make sure his car was in its usual parking space.

What was going on?

"Deke! Deke Dewitt! You in here?"

"I'm coming! I'm coming! Hold your horses, Daisy Ann!"

Deke came out of the back of the store.

"What in the world happened to you?"

The poor man looked like he'd been rear-ended by a semi then squished with a steamroller and pummeled with a jackhammer for good measure. He had a black eye and an abrasion on his forehead. There were large bruises on both forearms.

"Some punks out were hanging out in the front lot last night. It was late. I think they were high. I dunno. They acted like it. Drug deal probably. I was out back late waiting to see if those pranksters came back. I rounded the building. Yelled at them. It seemed to scare them for a second. Some of them ran like roaches when a light switch is turned on. A few stood their ground. Anyway, it was four against one. But I showed 'em who was boss."

"You did, huh. That's a pretty good shiner you're sporting there, hoss," Daisy Ann said. "You didn't break any bones, did you? You look mighty black and blue."

"Ain't it a beaut," he said. "But if you think this is something, you should see them kids."

"I'll pass. I gave up parking lot parties and late night fights long ago. Too much drama for my arteries. Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yeah," he said. "I hit the pavement once or twice, but I bounced back. I'm just a little sore. Moving slow, but nothing's broken."

"We're not kids, anymore, Deke."

"Tell me about it. But this old fart's still got a few tricks up his sleeve. I didn't back down. In fact, I think I put the fear of God into them. They won't be giving us any more trouble."

"If you say so," she said.

"I do," he said.

"I called the sheriff's. By the time Richmond got there, they'd all run off. It took him forever to get over here. I thought I'd have to apply for Social Security before he finally pulled into the lot."

"Maybe he was on the other side of the county."

"I don't think so. He must've been down at Shirley's. Smelled of beer.

Anyway, I told 'em what happened. He didn't bother to write three sentences down. It was dark. I couldn't give him any names. Not too sure what they looked like. They all had on dark outfits. Jeans. I was too busy busting chops to take a good look, you know.

He told me he'd keep an eye out, but he told me I hadn't given him anything to work on. He said it was hard to press charges against ghosts."

"He's a blood blister," she said. "What are you smiling at?"

"I thought I was a sight," he said. "But you look like the bad end of a Mardi Gras hangover."

"Don't beat a dead horse, Deke. It ain't kind," she said. "I know what I look like. I stood in front of the mirror for over an hour this morning and nothing changed. I kept hoping I'd sprout something pretty, but the growing signs ain't in pretty clothes today. Hideous. Ridiculous. Tacky. And those are just the first words that pop into my mind. Stop laughing, will ya? I have my dear little sister to thank for this fiasco."

"Iggi cleaned you out good, didn't she?"

"Like a mineral oil enema."

"I wondered how it would go, Daisy Ann, when you told me she was going to do a bit of spring cleaning for you. She does have a tendency to go overboard, sometimes. Runs in your family."

"How was I to know that when I hired her to organize my closet and clean out a few things, she would decide to donate everything to charity?"

"Charity, huh. You look like a charity case in that outfit."

"Don't I know it! And to top it all off, these colors make me look like a seasick melon. My complexion is as green as a gourd in this getup!"

"We make a pretty pair," said Deke.

Daisy Ann frowned.

"You could have been killed, you know."

"Oh, Daisy Ann. You really care."

"Hush up, you old fool," she said. "You'll make me blush like and overripe peach and ruin my perfectly green complexion."