"Good morning beautiful..." I say to my boyfriend, Thom. He begrudgingly sits up and proceeds to stretch out like a cat on the bed, I laugh at this and pat him on the head as he stands up and walks over to the bathroom. Shortly afterwards I hear a loud gasp and a scream, I get out of bed slowly and walk over to the door (because no one is worth me getting up and rushing over to them, not even my pookie bear Thommy) as I walk over I see Thom holding a pregnancy test.
"Thom..?"
"Jonny..."
"What is it?"
"I'm pregnant... And we're keeping it."
"Oh... You made me get out of bed for that?"
"It's a huge deal though..."
"Does this mean we have to get married?"
"I guess..."
I groan and walk back over to my bed as I fall back onto it.
"I'm going back to sleep.."
I say before I close my eyes and fall back asleep.
[A few weeks later]
Remember when Thom said we should get married? Well it's happening now, fuck proper 'plot points' and all that bollocks. Anyway, I'm standing at the altar waiting for Thom to arrive when the priest whispers in my ear.
"Will you sign my Kid A CD..?" He says. Damn, I'm getting fanboyed over at my own wedding? I get out a pen (because I always expect these sorts of situations, I'm just trying that famous) and I sign the CD just in time for me to see my precius Thom-Thom walking down the aisle in his beautiful white dress, I stare down at him (he's built like a fucking beanstalk) in awe and hold his hand. We say our vows (I'm not typing that shit out) before the priest speaks again
"I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride." Thom's not a bride, but okay.
I kiss Thom, sneaking my extra teeth in ad I put the ring on his sixth finger.
THE END.
