The Seesaw Steadies (A Chaste Yoonmin Fan Fic Drabble)

The Seesaw Steadies

As soon as Yoongi shut off the camera, Jimin's full cheeks flattened as his smile faded. The mask he wore for ARMY was no longer necessary. Jimin tugged on the shirt sleeves of his Agust D: D-Day tee-shirt until they covered both his hands. Unable to fidget with anything else but his emotions, he spoke formally to Yoongi.

"Hyung, truly your concert was really good." Jimin clapped his hands together in muted applause. "A whole tour on your own, so brave."

Yoongi's cheeks reddened at the younger man's compliment, but didn't turn to face him until he drank another swallow of ice water and swooped his sweaty hair off his forehead. Like millions of Yoongi's fans, this simple gesture also made Jimin's stomach flutter. He tapped his hands on his thighs to suppress the urge to comb back his former lover's hair and kiss him on the forehead. "Job well done, oppa," he would have teased before kissing a trail from the crease between Yoongi's brows to his cupid's bow. As Jimin would reach the top of Yoongi's mouth, Yoongi would cup Jimin's face and kiss him fully. This was when they were younger and feverish with the first flush of love.

"You think so?" Yoongi spun around in the hotel's desk chair and caught Jimin's eyes in his gaze. "What was your favorite part?" Yoongi didn't try to hide his desire for praise, especially from his JIminnie.

Jimin chuckled, freed his hand, and patted the couch cushion next to him. "Why are you sitting so far away?"

"I'm sweaty, I have to wash up." Yoongi shrugged.

"Hmmph." Jimin also shrugged. Both of the men's questions remained unanswered and hanging in the air until Yoongi finally sat next to Jimin. "I like the stripped down version of Seesaw," Jimin finally responded. He poked a finger from out of his shirtsleeve and laid it tentatively on the back of Yoongi's hand. SInce he didn't flinch or pull back, Jimin traced the outline of the veins on the back of Yoongi's hand. "I liked how the cameraman did a close up on your hands as you played the piano."

Yoongi chuckled, flexed his fingers, and then outstretched them as though he had a keyboard in front of him. Jimin gulped loudly at the action. "You were worse than ARMY." Yoongi slid his hands from underneath Jimin's touch, and focused on a spot across the hotel room.

"Do you think they know?"

"Know what?" Yoongi grabbed the water bottle and took a long swallow before glancing sideways to Jimin.

"That Seesaw is a song about us." Jimin grasped Yoongi by the chin and gently guided his face in his direction.

"Who? Our fans? The members?" Yoongi shrugged noncommittally. "Definitely Joon-ah, maybe Tae." Yoongi arched his brow. "You tell him everything, don't you?"

Jimin couldn't deny the accusation. "I suppose yes, but I didn't tell him everything about us." Jimin fluttered his eyes at Yoongi. The corners of Yoongi's mouth curled into a smile, unable to resist Jimin's flirty charms. "You ever think about us," Jimin began cautiously. "Have you ever thought about us being like that again?"

"More often than you can imagine." Yoongi grimaced. "But being friends was better for us, for everyone. Things were getting too complicated with the group."

"Better for us to break up than for the group to break up," JImin stated matter of factly and Yoongi only nodded. "Things are different now," Jimin whispered, gaze dropping into his lap.

"Certainly it is."

"I miss my boyfriend," Jimin confided.

With this confession, Yoongi's eyes widened. "What about you and Hobi?"

Jimin barked out a laugh. "Me and Hobi-hyung? We're just friends."

Yoongi slid closer to Jimin, cradling the younger man's hip until the gentle pressure forced Jimin's torso to be parallel to his. "We were just friends once until we weren't." Jimin didn't stop Yoongi from slipping a hand under his tee shirt, and ghosting his fingertips over his ribcage until they rested on his "Nevermind" tattoo.

"But Hobi- hyung is just," Jimin stuttered and lost his words.

"Suga-hyung," Yoongi's voice dropped an octave. "Think very carefully, Jimin-ah. Suga-hyung or Suga-yeobo?" Yoongi pressed his mouth against Jimin's ear. "I'll tell you what I want first if it will make things easier for you to say."

"Well," Jimin sighed. "This is a change." He tried to remain cool underpressure. "Remember when I had to convince you to confess your feelings?"

"I do." Yoongi whispered and kissed the outer shell of his Jimin's ear. "I'm braver now."

"And bolder." Jimin gripped the back of Yoongi's neck and threaded his fingers through Yoongi's shoulder length hair. "We should wait."

"Until?"

"2025."

"Look at us being sensible again." Yoongi's laugh held no joy. "Sensible is what happened before."

"But, as you agreed to earlier, things are very different now." Jimin tugged at Yoongi's hair, exposing his throat. A soft moan reverberated in his chest. "You're still very sexy Min Yoongi." JImin licked a sheen of sweet from the underside of Yoongi's neck.

Yoongi fell back onto the sofa so Jimin was on top of him. He wrapped Jimin in his arms. "Okay, 2025, let's try again." Yoongi covered Jimin's face with kisses. Once the two came up for air, Yoongi queried "What are we doing right now if we're waiting until 2025?"

Jimin inhaled deeply through his nose and sucked in his bottom lip as he thought of an answer. "I am not quite sure." Jimin nuzzled his nose against Yoongi's. "Let's just say that we found a new balance on the seesaw."

Notes:

Timeline:
2015:Yoongi and Jimin start a youthful romance
2018: Yoongi and Jimin go back to being just friends.
2021-22: Implied affair between Jimin and Hoseok
2023: D-Day Tour, April 30, 2023

Seesaw English Translation (Doolset)
https://doolsetbangtan.wordpress.com/2018/08/24/trivia-seesaw/

In the beginning, well, it was fun
Just going up and down itself
Before we knew, we both became sick of
meaningless waste of emotions
A repeated seesaw, seesaw game
Having come this far, I got sick of, got sick of it

A repeated seesaw, seesaw game
We're both got tired and became sick of it
Was the small argument the beginning?
The moment when I became heavier than you

There has never been a paralleled balance from the beginning–
would that be why we were more eager to reach the balance?
If it was love, and if it is the word love itself,
would there be any need to repeat it?
It seems like we're both tired and holding the same card in our hands
Then, well...
All right, a repeated seesaw game
I try to put an end to it only now
All right, a boring seesaw game
Someone has to get off this seesaw

Though I can't
Let's not read each other's face trying to figure out who's going to get off or not
Let's not drag it on and do as we please
Let's now make the decision whether to get off or not
A repetitive seesaw game
Now, stop

How crafty the heart of a person is
Though we know one will get hurt if the other is not there,
because we both don't want to be the bad guy,
we continue to awkwardly pass the buck, umm umm
and end up becoming exhausted, ironically reaching the paralleled balance

Ay, this is not the kind of balance that I wanted
In the beginning, we brag about who is heavier
and smile, looking at each other
Now we became to compete over who is heavier

It became a tinderbox for a war
It seems like, eventually, someone will have to get off to end it
We should stop pretending to care for each other and decide now
If we didn't have feelings for each other,
if we didn't think of each other,
would we have dragged it on like this?
(visit website for rest of lyrics)