Tales From Fish-Rat

Bad Dog ~ Courtroom Shenanigans

Courtroom Shenanigans is a game where the prosecutor makes something up, and the judge decides what the punishment for the defendant is if they lose the case. The jury casts their vote.

This story has... light cursing. it's a courtroom, what? You wanted guns and booze? Sorry, nothin.

And so, the story begins.

This document is a manuscript from the Fishrat (Scug Lat) vs Dog (Literally just a dog) case.

Bailiff: Please rise. The court of the Second Judicial Circuit, Property Division, is now in session, the honorable judge Boykisser presiding.
Judge: Everyone but the jury may be seated. Mr. Faith, please swear in the jury.
Bailiff: Yeah, y'all idiots swear not to lie and crap?
Jury: OWDTAYEAH GUILLLTYYY LYNCH HIM! SUGONMA LIGMA, EAT JOE BIDEN TOES! MOOOOoooooooo
Judge: Your job here today, jury, is to decide using the facts and stuff presented here today, to decide if the crime the defendant did is real, or if Mr. Fishrat is a damn dirty liar. Hey... disgusting Purple Giant thing, what are we arguing about today?
Bailiff: Your honorable goofy ahh self dressed up as a Boykisser, todays case is the case of... a Fish suing a dog foooorr...?
Prosecutor: HE ATE MY HOMEWORK! HE ATE IT!
"Prosecutor is in visible distress, crying and yelling, while the prosecutor's attorney is trying to calm him"
Bailiff: Are y'all idiots ready to rumble?
Prosecuting attorney: Yes, your honor.
Defense attorney: Yes, your honor.
Prosecution attorney: Your honor, members of the jury, my name is Grognak The Destroyer, and I am representing Mr. Scug Lat in this case. I intend to prove that on the day of last week, this dog, purposefully, with malice and spite, ate Mr. Scug's geometry homework. Please find this Dog guilty of eating his homework. Thank you.
Defense attorney: Your honor, members of the jury, my name is Saul Goodman, and I am representing this dog in this case. I intend to prove that on the day of last week, the day the dog presumably ate his homework, is not real. Please find this dog not guilty of eating his homework. Thank you.
Prosecuting attorney: Thank you, your Honor. I call to the stand Mr. Ruffles.
Judge: Will the witness please stand to be sworn in by the bailiff?
Bailiff: Raise your right hand. If you dare tell a lie, I'll know, I'll smell it in your sweat, I'll taste the fear in the air, I'll watch your tail curl around your leg nervously as you try to get out of it, but it'll be too late, and then I'll give you a knuckle sandwich garnished with your teeth.
Editors Note ~ This courtroom is weird, the bailiff is a giant purple monster thing, like Au Oni or however you spell it, the judge is Boykisser from the meme... The witness is a weird vaporeon looking wet mouse... thing... I'm scared, please, I shouldn't be here there's a damn cow in the jury like literally a milk cow, please help me!
Witness: I... do...
Prosecuting attorney: Please state you name for the court.
Witness: I'm... Rivulet. From rainworld... not really, I just use a rivulet profile picture on Nightcafe I guess...
Prosecutor: State your evidence on the case.
Witness: Well uh, I know Scug and, he definitely... would... probably not destroy his own homework. Except for the pointless busywork he once told me the story of how he turned his Spanish work into a paper airplane, and got sent to ISS because he wouldn't stop turning the Spanish work into more airplanes... wait is he on defense or offense?
Prosecutor: Be quiet or I'll testify against you in the Stolen Organ Pebbles case.
Prosecuting attorney: Thats enough Mr. Ruffles.
Judge: The defense may cross examine the witness.
Defense attorney: Your honor, these allegations are baseless and racially motivated, Mr. Fishrat is known for having memory issues, admitting to having these memory issues, as well as the fact he can't keep his backpack organized. He probably just lost it like he's going to lose this case.
Prosecuting attorney: OBJECTION!
Judge: You have the floor.
Prosecuting attorney: The hell does this have to do with the cross examination?
Defense attorney: The hell do I care?
Judge: You may call in your second witness, prosecutor.
Prosecuting attorney: Your honor, I call to the stand. Scug's brother, Ummm... Meme... Boy...
Judge: Bailiff, do the thing.
Bailiff: Witness, do the thing.
Witness: I promise not to lie.
Prosecutor: Witness, do the thing.
Witness: I'm his brother. Every day when he comes home, he does his homework sometimes... I saw him doing it! He wasn't lying about the homework. Except for now, right now he's ignoring an essay he's supposed to be writing, and writing this stupid story instead. I don't get payed enough for voice acting this. I don't get payed at all. (I actually made him say these lines pretending to record it ^o~0^)
Judge: Defense may now cross examine the case.
Defense attorney: What? What do you want me to do? I've already won... I'm just sitting here until I get payed.
Judge: Fine then... you jackass, prosecutor, third witness, lets finish this.
Prosecutor attorney: I call to the stand, Wolf, business partner of Mr. Scug... or was it Fishrat, wait who are you?
Prosecutor: This is a mixture of the real events from Roblox, and fabricated events for storytelling purposes, for example, Mr. Ruffles wasn't actually playing Courtroom shenanigans with me. Most people know me as Scug Lat, But on Roblox most people know me as Fish Rat, but my username is actually...