To Save A Life (EXO FANFIC)

The End

Worthless. Fat. Ugly. Invisible. No one care. People say you can trust them, but then turn right around and show you all the reasons why not to. I can't live up to your expectation's or societies. I'm not short and adorable, or tall and slim. No, im average: ugly and fat. I'm not someone you would walk by and look back at. I don't have the perfect silky hair or the pretty eyes. No, instead I have short frizzy hair, messed up teeth and shit brown eyes. I mean nothing to no one, and I know that for a fact, my mother has told me multiple times that I was a mistake and that she wished she would have never had me. My father nevereven gave me a chance, he wanted to give me up before I was even born, he wanted to kill me. And I don't blame him. Because now I too, want to kill myself. That is why I'm standing here, on the edge of my apartment building. 35 stories high with a small lake beside it. The blue brown water below is about 15 feet deep. Just what I needed. You see, I'm tired of the voices and the lies, I'm tired of all the screaming and crying myself to sleep every night, self inflicted pain doesn't help anymore. I want all of it to stop. And there's only one way to do that. I've tried over dosing and bleeding out, ive tried hanging myself or simply putting a gun to my head. But as you can see, each time I've failed. I should have died, but there was always something that brought me back to consciousness, something that's always stopped me, from completely losing it. I've been sent to many "get well soon" hospitals and sent home like I was all better. The truth is, the only thing that's gotten better is my lies. my acting,. They're supposed to be smart, helpful yet they let a slick teenage girl slide right past them with silly lies like, " I'm feeling a lot better today" and, " may i have seconds" even a dog would know i was lying. But I'm free now...well, I will be soon. Just one step away. No one ever comes up here, not at night, not ever. They're too afraid. No one would think to find me here, Maybe because I've always told them that I was afraid of deep waters and hights, but here i am . I slowly bring one leg over the rusted old metel on the side of the building. There is a light breeze, making my skin crawl with goosebumps. I steadily pull myself the rest of the way over the metal bar, carefully sitting on it. I look out over the water, the city lights are giving off a small arouma of color over the land. The sky is partly cloudy with random stars dotted all over the place. I sat quietly for a bit longer then rose to my feet. Taking in one last sharp breath. This was it, just don't think, don't feel and it'll all be over soon. I feel warm tears roll down my cheeks as I go to step off, wanting to just jump into the quiet of the night. In the distance I hear a faint noise, yelling. I turn, surprised to see someone has came up here, but it was so dark and I couldn't see them, I doubt they could see me as well. They stopped yelling and became quiet for a while, then continued to yell. 'Phone call', I thought to myself. I turn and continue looking out into the water as the man continues to yell. Ignoring him, I close my eyes tightly, taking a deep breath. There was a small voice in the back of my mind, 'don't do this', it just kept repeating. I grab the pole and get ready to jump. As my feet leave the building, I smile. All of a suddon, I hear the man. This time he's yelling, no calling...to me? "OH MY GOD!" I hear his feet patter against the roof of the building, getting closer. I knew what he was going to do, he was going to try and stop me, but i wasnt goung to let that happen, not this time. "NO, PLEASE, DONT JUMP", his voice is louder, closer. I panick and let go of the bar, plummeting down. I feel like a free bird. A warm hand slightly graze my arm but couldnt gasp it in time, leaving me to fall. Soon I am met by the freezing water. Though even that didn't effect me, I was in shock; numb, inside and out. I didn't struggle, I wanted this, I can't back out now. There are big black dots taking over my vision and i feel my self fading out of this world. I am sinking into death, literally. I am happy for once . That is until, I feel a harsh tug on my arm. Pulling me against the waves of the water until we reach the surface, I couldn't breath, struggling against this foreign feeling, my chest feels as if its going to explode. I get pulled to the top and the cold wind nips painfully at my skin. Opening my mouth to take a breath but get nothing but water. I'm choking, my vision is still as blurry as ever and all I can hear is my heart beating in my ears. I feel myself getting thrown onto a hard surface, and someone pushing on my chest. It hurt, and I was still struggling with my breaths. I used what energy I had left to open my eyes and see who was doing this, why couldn't they just let me die? It was the man, i couldnt see much detail of his face because the lighting of the moon behind his head was shodowing the front of him. He looks to my face and we make eye contact, his features showed fright. I could see him clearnly now, he was beautiful. He had bright white skin, almost pale, he had big eyes and bright red lips. It was too dark to determine the color of the hair that was sticking to his forhead, I couldn't help but stare as he smiled at me, relief washing over his face. My vision began to get splotchy, I couldn't feel anything. 'Is this what death feels like?' I wouldn't mind, dying in the arms of an angel-like man. His lips were moving, but I couldn't hear a thing he was saying, my eyes begin to shut by themselfs and my breathing is becoming uncontrollably shallow. The mans smile quickly faded, turning into a panicked look. My eyes shut, having no energy left, wishing to just be at the bottom of the lake. My head starts pounding and I can feel the man picking me up as silence taking over my mind. 'I'm gonna break his arms, he's gonna drop me, I'm too fat for him to carry' the voices started up again right before I blacked out.
Why didnt I jump sooner?