I Never Told You, What I Should've Said.

I Never Told You

It wasn't supposed to end like this. No. We were supposed to die really old men, at home in our sleep. Not because of The Owl. Not because of some stupid Anteiku raid. Any way but this.

I looked around at all the bodies that littered the ground. Among them, Iwa and Shinohara. My heartbeat quickened. Was Shinohara okay? Was I okay? I turned my attention toward The Owl momentarily, just in time too, as it was raising it's kagune in my direction, ready to impale me. I wasn't scared though. Not an ounce of fear jolted through my system at the sight. I'd taken down hundreds of ghouls during my time as a scrapper. How was The Owl so different?

As The Owl began his attack, I closed my eyes and put my arms up to shield my face, bracing myself for the oncoming attack. Maybe dying wouldn't be that bad at this point. I could die with Shinohara laying a few feet away from me. I waited, and when The Owl's attack never came, I opened my eyes to the one sight I couldn't bear to see. The Owl's kagune ran straight through Shinohara, as he used his broken battered body to shield me from harms way.

I reached my hand out to him, mind racing in so many directions, "Shino. . .hara. . .san?"

He coughed up blood, some making it's way on to my face in small spatters. He gave me a warm smile, and weakly reached toward me, barely whispering, "Run," His eyelids fell closed, and he fell forward. Body laying mere inches from me.

My body shook in tremors, like an earthquake had gone off in my bones, and a sharp pain engulfed my chest, as if I had been the one injured by The Owl. Is this what it felt like, to lose someone so incredibly special to you? Is this what Nashiro and Kurona were talking about that day? When Shizuku died, is this what they felt? This horrible gut-wrenching pain? I didn't like this. I didn't like this at all.

I reached out to Shinohara, hoping he would grab my hand, and allow me to help him up, just like he did when he taught me proper hand-to-hand combat that one day years ago. Instead, my hand was left hovering above his blood soaked arm, trembling in the fear that Shinohara might not be okay this time. He might not be coming home tonight. I might be left on the sofa to breathe in what remains of his scent, to be alone. Alone. No. Please no. Not again. I couldn't handle it. I would not turn into Rei Suzuya again. I was Juuzou. Juuzou Suzu- No. Juuzou Shinohara. I was not in a cage ready to slaughter people every night to please a fake Mama who never loved me. I was an Investigator to eliminate ghouls, and I lived right beside my partner- the one who I called Papa- in an apartment in the 20th ward, where we were stationed.

I grit my teeth, and looked up at The Owl, screaming at the top of my lungs, "Shinohara-san!". I grabbed my quinque, which I named Juuzou's Jason, after I was given it with Shinohara by my side, and got up running at The Owl at full speed. I would just kill The Owl and me and Shinohara could go home. Right? Right? Shinohara could go to the doctor and get bandaged up a bit. He's be all better, and I could take care of him. I'd done it before, so what was different now? I could slaughter this stupid ghoul right now, and everything would be back to normal.

Shinohara would be fine. I repeated that, over and over in my head, almost driving myself mad. I raised my quinque, landing several blows on The Owl, yet barely making a scratch on his hard exterior and kagune. Before I could formulate my next attack, I found myself smacked hard across the rooftop we resided on, finally landing in a pile of building beams. I winced in pain, looking down at my leg, to see it twisted out of shape. There's no way I could walk on it, but one look at Shinohara's motionless body, propelled me upward, limping toward another attack on The Owl, only to find myself being smacked around again and again and again.

This fight was looking hopeless. My ankle and lower leg was badly broken, and my body ached, begging me to stop. Blood trickled down my forehead, and down my chin, but I couldn't give up. If I didn't do something, The Owl could touch Shinohara. He could try to eat Shinohara. I shuddered, not even letting that thought visualize in my mind. I tried to stand, but fell back onto my knees. My weak withered body couldn't carry my weight anymore, and I could feel my consciousness slowly slipping away. I crawled over to Shinohara, laying myself over him, shielding him from The Owl. I'd give up my life to protect him. No matter what.