All I Wanted Was You

O N E : Do You Remember When You Loved Me Once?

"Just stay with me a minute, I swear I'll make it worth it. Just one last time, and I'll promise to let you go."

"And I know she gives you everything but I got nothing here without ya."

"Baby I don't care if you got her in your heart. I still am in love with you. 'Cause I can't live without you." I confessed as I looked into his hazel brown eyes.

》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》'》

'~◇𝖇𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖎𝖊◇~'

Breaking up with Jesse was the biggest fucking mistake of my life. We're still friends though, but it's not the same. How did we end up like this, what went wrong between us? I wish he would take me back, I want to be with him again.

But then, I realize that it's much too late, he has found someone else. And he deserves someone better, someone who can make him happy. Someone like Gabriette. I've never met her in person before, but the way Jesse always talks about her makes me jealous. It's obvious that he loves her and only her, and I'm nothing to him. I'm forgotten, like a faded photograph.

He doesn't love me anymore. He only sees me as his toy, his possession. He is a psychopath who won't let me go. I wish I could escape from this hell and find my way back to Jesse. He is the only one who ever made me feel alive. Even after all these years, he is still the one who haunts my dreams.

He has no love for me, only cruelty. He treats me like an object, a thing that he owns. He is a madman who traps me in his web. I long to break free from this nightmare and run into Jesse’s arms. He is the only one who ever understood me. Even after all this time, he is still the one who fills my heart.

He loves me not, he loves me never. He uses me like a tool, a puppet that he controls. He is a lunatic who chains me to his side. I yearn to flee from this horror and fly to Jesse’s embrace. He is the only one who ever cared for me. Even after all this while, he is still the one who sparks my soul.

I was at Crossroads, all the memories came back
Where our love started, and had ended with a date. I watched him hug his wife and daughter, feeling a surge of emotions. He looked so happy, so perfect. He was Jesse, my ex, my friend, my love. I didn't want to intrude, so I remained at my seat, my eyes fixed on them.

We had been together for years, but we broke up when our careers took us to different places. We couldn't handle the distance, the pressure, the fame. We decided to stay friends, but it was hard. It was hard to see him with someone else, someone who wasn't me.

He married Gabriette, a model, and had a daughter, Mila. They were beautiful, they were happy, they were his family. And I was nothing. I was just Billie. Billie Eilish, a singer, a star, but deep inside, a loner.

I'm currently with Matthew, an actor, who treated me like shit. I knew I shouldn't have gave him another fucking chance. He doesn't love me, he doesn't give a fuck about me. He only wants me for what I could give him, what I could do for him. He's selfish, cruel and such a bitch.

He leaned in and whispered in my ear, "Come on, let's go. We have a party to attend. You don't want to miss it, do you?"

I shook my head, forcing a smile. I followed him, leaving Jesse behind. I wondered if he ever thought of me, if he ever missed me, if he ever regretted letting me go.

I knew the answer. He didn't. He was happy without me. And I was miserable without him.

We got in the car and Matthew started it as we drove back home. I put on a black hoodie and some green cargo-pants. Matthew glanced at me and frowned. "What are you wearing? You're not chilling at home. We're going to my friend's party and how the hell do you expect me to introduce you as my girlfriend with you dressed like that? Change into this instead!" He shouted, throwing a skimpy dress and a pair of heels at me.

My ears burned and my eyes watered. I hated this. I hated him. I hated myself. I changed into the dress and the heels that he threw at me. I felt so exposed, so vulnerable, so not me. I just wanted to wear something comfortable, something that suited me, something that made me happy. But he didn't care. He never cared. He only cared about himself, his image, his reputation. He looked at me and smiled, "Now that's more like it." He smirked, grabbing my waist and pulling me close to him.

I buried my face in his chest, holding back my tears. I fucking hated it but I had no choice left. He lifted my chin, and kissed my cheek. "See, you look great! C'mon let's go." I was bursting out of anger on the inside as we got in the limousine.

We arrived at the party, and Matthew dragged me out of the limousine. He wrapped his arm around my waist and led me to the entrance. He flashed his smile, and greeted his friends. Their eyes were glued on me.

I felt like a doll, a trophy, a toy. I felt like I didn't belong, I didn't matter, I didn't exist. I wanted to scream, to run, to disappear. But I couldn't. I had to stay, to smile, to pretend. I had to fake a smile.

I saw him across the room. He was talking to someone, laughing. He looked so handsome, so charming, so real. He was Jesse. But he's no longer mine.

He noticed me and smiled. I glanced at Matthew and as usual, he was flirting with some random girls. He excused himself, and walked towards me. He reached me, and touched my arm. He spoke to me, and said my name.

"Hey! What's up Bil?"

I looked at him, and felt a rush of emotions. I looked at him, and felt a spark of hope, a glimpse of happiness.

I opened my mouth, and tried to speak. But before I could, Matthew interrupted.

"Hey, Jesse. Long time no see. How are you, man?"

He looked at Matthew, and his face hardened, trying his best not to beat the shit out of him. He didn't do that only 'cause I got back with Matthew. I had never told him about how abusive this bitchy Matthew is. For all I know, Jesse's mood soured.

"I'm fine, Matthew. And you?"

"I'm great, Jesse. Just enjoying the party with my girlfriend."

He looked at me, and his eyes softened.

"Mhm."

We looked at each other, and we remembered. We remembered the past, the present, the future. We remembered the love, the pain, the loss. We remembered the good, the bad, the ugly.

I wished I could turn back time. Well, that can't never happen, can't it?

Matthew was drunk as fuck. Oh god, he's going to be forcing me into things tonight. I feel so fucking helpless. Jesse never did shit like Matthew when he was drunk. He actually cared, loved me. He was the one that truly loved me.

I gazed into his eyes, and we said nothing. But we said everything.

I still wanted to ask him 'Do you remember when you loved me once?'

# **𝕋𝕠 𝕓𝕖 𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕦𝕖𝕕. . .**

A/N : NEW STORY! HEHEHE. What do y'all think? Some predictions on how did Billie and Jesse called it quits and why'd Billie end up with her abusive ex, Matthew.