Pursuit of Happiness | Taz Skylar

076. groupchat

[taz, kiki, emily, mackenyu & jacob]

taz
for anyone who wants to catch up, me and zoe will be in london next week

kiki
i'm gonna pick her up the second i see her
i've heard she's tiny

taz
she is tiny
she only comes up to about my shoulder

emily
i knew she was tiny but i didn't realize she was THAT tiny

kiki
i'm going to pick her up

taz
kiki i am going to tell you something very important about my girlfriend
she is very weird about her height
she will probably punch you if you try to pick her up

jacob
that's two things buddy

taz
they're related to each other it still counts
the point is – please don't pick her up

kiki
i think i could take zoe

emily
kiki look at her instagram
this is a woman who is addicted to rock climbing and it shows
she looks like she could bench press me

taz
emily please don't tell zoe that you think she could bench press you
she would probably try it

mackenyu
she can't be that bad surely

taz
sober, she's not that bad, but when she gets drunk she has two modes
she either starts writing music or she goes kind of bonkers

mackenyu
are we drinking, are we?

taz
"they don't have to, but i'm not meeting multiple people i don't know without at least a little booze to take the edge off" – zoe
meaning she'll get tipsy but i doubt there'll be any bonkers drunk shenanigans

jacob
what do you mean by she goes bonkers?

taz
so remember that photo i showed you guys of me and her from back in the day where she was soaking wet?

jacob
vaguely yeah

emily
i love that photo of you two tbh

taz
so the reason she's soaking wet is because she decided to do a backflip into the pool while fully clothed. jay probably still has the video of it somewhere

jacob
how drunk was she when she did this?

taz
drunk enough that she forgot she was wearing her sister's shoes
it was fun trying to talk ivy down from murdering zoe over it

emily
taz where the hell did you find this woman
she sounds like a handful

taz
i'm sure there's people who say the same thing about me

emily
that's true

kiki
she sounds fun
i think i'm going to like her

taz
and she's probably going to like you
just don't pick her up

kiki
no promises

taz
it's your funeral