I'm sorry for the delay of updates but I'm on exams every day before the Christmas holidays.
I will try to update soon.
🤞🤞🤞Colin couldn't stop looking at Penelope and stroking her hand ever so subtly; he needed her to know he would always be there.
"I think we should let the bride and groom-to-be talk. Let's go outside," suggested Violet.
"And we should get back to the wedding before they start noticing the absence of the whole family," Felicity commented to her husband.
Felicity kissed her sister and walked out with her now husband. Colin looked at his mother and thanked her, to which Violet nodded and Daphne gave him a reassuring look. Right now Penelope was still disoriented and they needed to talk about all of this calmly. They all left the room and Colin closed the door.
"What... What's going on?" asked Penelope with some bewilderment.
"It was my fault," said Colin somewhat nervously.
"Please tell me what happened, otherwise I won't be able to understand your pallor. Something is troubling me," Penelope confessed.
"I had been sitting in the hallway for hours thinking that I was going to lose you and when I saw you alive I couldn't resist giving you a kiss. And at that very moment your mother came in," said Colin, deeply regretting it.
"Trying to sit up "Are you telling me that whilst I was unconscious, my mother saw you kiss me on the lips?" " Colin nodded. "God, I'm finished," Penelope said tearfully.
"You're not finished at all, Penelope," he said, taking her hands. "No one besides your family has seen it. As soon as" Penelope interrupted him.
"You don't understand, do you?" I didn't want to get married like this, I wanted to have a nice courtship, to hold arms and walk around in front of everyone, to have letters written to me in the early hours of the morning... Not this," she said, shaking her head.
Penelope put her hand to her head from where a small amount of blood still smeared, so she groaned and lay back down, staring at the ceiling. She wanted a union for love, not a union for commitment, for jeopardising her honour in front of her family.
"Let's not talk about it now," Colin finally said with a serious look on his face. "I don't want to pressure you, but... Are you going to tell me what important thing you had to do to leave your sister's wedding? And if it's because of Lady Whistledown, I swear I'm going to be angry now, Penelope," he said with a certain authority in his tone.
"Do you really think I would leave my sister's wedding for Lady Whistledown? What do you take me for, Colin?" she reproached him.
He felt he should relax as the nerves he had been going through because of not knowing Pen's condition were taking their toll on him and were taking their toll on him with her. Then he saw a tear well up in Penelope's eyes again.
"Pen didn't mean it," he said, moving closer and hugging her in his arms being careful not to hurt her even more.
"It's not you Colin," Penelope finally said.
"So?" he said, looking at her.
"It's about Marina. It was because of Marina that I didn't attend the wedding," she finally replied.
Young Bridgerton's chest still ached, but not from love, but from the thought of the betrayal he was going to put him through, and the low esteem in which she held him in consequence.
"Tell me what happened. Only then will I be able to help you," he asked Penelope.
"Pen took a deep breath of air and finally gave it, "Marina has committed suicide Colin".
Penelope began to cry inconsolably and Colin stood still, not moving a muscle in his body. It was unthinkable that she could have taken her own life, it was unthinkable.
"I didn't...I didn't hear it right, Pen," said Colin.
"Worst of all, I think it was my fault," Penelope confessed, wiping away her tears.
It was then that Colin managed to react and crouched down by Penelope's side to get a good look at her.
"Listen to me, Pen, you are not to blame for anything. Do you understand?" Colin insisted.
"I condemned her. I pushed her to make that decision. I rushed everything and she hasn't been able to handle it," Penelope blamed herself."
"Hey listen to me," he said, taking her face in his hands, "Marina tried to do something that I will not dignify with words. And it was me she tried to do it to. You were only protecting my honour as I have so often protected yours. I will not let you take the burden or the blame for Marina's death," Colin replied.
Even at a time like this, all Colin could focus on were Penelope's lips and the desire he had to kiss her again. Not what he had done before, but to feel how she loved him.
Penelope clutched one of Colin's hands and wept until, exhausted, she slowly collapsed onto the bed. Colin had yet to come to terms with Marina's death. Even though she was no longer part of their lives, he could not be indifferent to it. And he couldn't stop thinking about what would have made her do it.Daphne knocked on the door and slowly entered the room.
"Are you OK?" she asked her brother.
"Yes. I just want her to get well and get out of that bed," he confessed.
"I have to say that I expected you to make a different kind of commitment, although I'm not the best person to talk to," said Daphne, sitting down next to her brother."Daphne needs to know something -" Daphne paid more attention to his words. "When you and Simon got engaged, what did you feel?"
"To tell you the truth, it all happened so fast that I didn't have time to process it. I felt at the time that Simon was forced to marry and that he would never love me, but then... Then I realised that he loved me more than I loved him at the time," she confessed with a smile.
"I feel that I have put Penelope in a dilemma. That I haven't given her the opportunity to choose what she really wanted".
"Oh little brother," she said wryly, "Penelope chose you a long time ago. You just have to give her space to assimilate what's about to happen,"
"But that's what we want more than anything else right now." he told to Daphne.
"But, Colin, you must understand one thing," she said, taking his hand. "Penelope has been waiting for this ever since she met you. She has suffered so much, and now she is about to achieve eternal glory when she becomes your wife. And you had no idea of these feelings for her until just about two months ago.All the confidence you have right now is what Penelope lacks, and any misstep will make her think she is not worthy of you," she said, looking down at Penelope, who was asleep.
Colin turned his head and stared at her. There could be many adjectives, many expressions, but wasn't she worthy of himself? If anything, it was the other way around, and he was going to make it his business every day for the rest of his life to let her know it
YOU ARE READING
Flawless My Dear ( English version )
ФанфикPenelope Featherington returns from the country more determined than ever to forget young Colin Bridgerton and find a husband who deserves her. But trouble is brewing when her feelings can't be buried and others begin to blossom.