Forever my Marine

Chapter #44⚠️

Chapter #44
⚠️Mentions of R@pe and intense emotions⚠️
Scarlett’s POV
Louri hasn’t said a word since everyone went home. “Hey, talk to me.” I say to her as she cleans the dishes. “I hate that he knows.” She sighs. “He doesn’t know everything, Louri.” I say placing my hand on her back and she flinches slightly. “Louri?” I say softly and she drops the plate. “I can’t get these damn memories out of my head.” She says as she begins to cry. “I’m right here.” I say as I wrap my arms around her and hold her close as she cries into my shoulder.
Lisa’s POV
I get back down stairs from putting the twins down for a nap Devon is working on his reading in his room with the book ‘Amelia Badelia’ . I was going to my room which is on the main floor but stopped when I heard crying and it sounds like Louri. “I don’t want to remember Scarlett. I don’t want to remember what they did to me!” She sobs and I can’t make out what Scarlett is saying but it’s clear she is trying to soothe Louri. I can’t help but stand there and listen. “They assaulted me Scarlett everyday! I feel like I’m drowning in memories. I can still feel them. I can still feel their hands on me!” She cries and I want to throw up. “I’ve got sixty eight scars on my body!” She continues. “How can you stand to look at me? I’m worthless!” She sobs. “Because I love you. Louri, you are the strongest person I know. You have been through hell no one should go through and if I could take your pain I would in a heartbeat.” I hear Scarlett say as I get a little closer to the kitchen. “And you are the mother of my children.” Scarlett adds and I hear Louri scoff something she has never done when the kids are mentioned. “Yeah well the mother of your children is broken beyond repair. I’m not enough for you or them. I’m not enough.” Louri says and it sounds as though she believes it. I can’t listen to this anymore. I won’t let anyone speak poorly of my kids, not even themselves. “You Louri Dollese Evans-Johansson are NOT broken beyond repair. You are strong. And you are enough just the way you are. I don’t know if you have heard of the band Citizen Soldier. But they have a song called You Are Enough I think fits this situation. You sing to your kids when they need it so I am going to sing to you. You may be thirty seven but you are still my baby. It goes like this. I walk over and take Louri in my arms as Scarlett stands to the side knowing that this is what Louri needs so I hold her close and sing to her as she sobs in my arms.
  “You see that glass half empty”
“Each time you look in the mirror”
“It's like the more you're trying”
“Your flaws start showing up clearer”
“You bleed emotion, so devoted to what people say”
“So sick of hoping, so you focus on all your mistakes”
“Stop changing, there's nothing to fix when life's a war for you”
“That's when your pulse becomes the proof”
“When you're a little messed up, when you're a little unwell”
“And nobody understands that you are going through hell”
“Right here, like this, right now”
“You are enough”
“When you've been broken and bruised because the past has been tough”
“Being human is what makes you something worthy of love”
“Right here, this sick, right now”
“You are enough”
“So don't give up”
“With every passing stranger”
“You find something that you're missing”
“So kind, except to yourself”
“You're anything but forgiving”
“You bleed emotion, so devoted to what people say”
“Give second chances left and right, and only take the blame”
“Don't change a single thing 'cause there is nothing wrong with you”
“What you feel now, don't make it truth”
“When you're a little messed up, when you're a little unwell”
“And nobody understands that you are going through hell”
“Right here, like this, right now”
“You are enough”
“When you've been broken and bruised because the past has been tough”
“Being human is what makes you something worthy of love”
“Right here, this sick, right now”
“You are enough”
“Stop chasing something that you're never gonna find”
“Already perfect, but your past has left you blind”
She clings to me like a scared child as I continue to sing and I look into her eyes. I have to look down since I am taller than her. I hate seeing the pain in her eyes.
“So when the voices in your head ain't being kind”
“Here is something to remind you”
“When you're a little messed up, when you're a little unwell”
“And nobody understands that you are going through hell”
“Right here, like this, right now”
“You are enough”
“When you've been broken and bruised because the past has been tough”
“Being human is what makes you something worthy of love”
“Right here, this sick, right now”
“You are enough”
“So don't give up”

“You are enough Louri Dollese. Do you understand me?” I say and she nods. “Thank you, Mama.” She says with so much vulnerability in her voice. “It’s true Louri. I wish I could take away your pain sweetie. It kills me to know you feel this way. You are an adult with your own kids but you will always be my baby and if I have to hold you and sing to you to help you feel better than I will.” I tell her. “So I’m not broken?” She asks. “No.” Scarlett says. “You should listen to her. She’s right, Louri. I know you can be the most self deprecating human on the planet. But when you get those voices saying those awful things about you, remember that you are not the horrible things you tell yourself. I love you Rebel.” I say using the nickname I called her when she was young making her smile. “Rebel?” Scarlett asks and Louri chuckles. “Well even before this one was born I knew she was a little rebel and would always stand out and be different but in the best way possible and she did." I say with a smile.

A/N
Sometimes you just need your mother. Happy birthday Scarlett. Anygays see you in the next one.