No More Tomorrows

Chapter 13: Heaving

"I need to run to the bathroom real quick. I'll meet you back at the table." 

I didn't wait for an answer. As I opened the door I looked back to Roxy getting her clothes sorted and Simon was still lounging with Mindy draped over him. Mindy feeding him sips of his scotch and rubbing his chest. It was obvious to me that she was trying to reclaim her top spot from the threat of Roxy.

My hands were shaking as I made my way past the bouncers, down the hall to the bathroom. I couldn't make eye contact and if I made it there before hurling up everything in my stomach it would be a miracle.

What had I done! What had I fucking done!

I'd just participated in a foursome with my boss and two strippers. I'd been inside another woman. A woman I'd paid to have sex with me. A woman who wasn't my girlfriend. 

I barely got the lock turned on the cubicle door before the heaving started. Scotch and steak and everything else I'd consumed came rushing out of my body into the toilet. The pains in my stomach were horrendous, but not as horrendous as the pain in my chest. 

I'd done it. I'd crossed that imaginary line I'd drawn myself in the sand. The one I swore I wouldn't cross, even if it meant losing my job. I'd had a moral line I told myself I'd never cross. Even if she'd never know and I'd finally be able to give her the kind of life she deserved. Money wasn't worth what I'd just done. 

If she ever found out about this she'd leave me. No way would she stay. Not after growing up with the kind of parents she did. Seeing her dad cheat on her mum and her mum take him back time after time until he finally left them both for good when she was fourteen. She had a zero tolerance policy when it came to cheating and I'd just blown it out of the fucking stratosphere. I'd not only fucked someone else, I'd paid for it.

I bent forward as my stomach heaved yet again. More and more heaves brutalised my body as my mind remembered every moment of what I'd just done. Eventually there was nothing left inside of me and the heaving stopped. Taking a few deep breaths to calm myself down before I had to return to the table with my boss I grabbed some toilet paper to wipe the sweat, tears and saliva from my face. Big mistake.

As I did so I caught the fragrance of the lube we'd used and what must have been the smell of Roxy's pussy from where I was fingering her before we fucked. My stomach immediately heaved and I found myself doubled over the toilet bowl yet again. 

It was a good ten minutes before I could get myself together enough to return to the table. Scrubbing my face and hands with the lemon fragrance soap helped to settle my churning stomach. Like if I couldn't smell what I'd done then I could escape my fuck ups for a moment so I could have one more drink before I escaped this hellish night. 

Right as I took my seat, the area at the front of the main stage lit up. I saw a beautiful blond haired woman standing there and plenty of men were giving her appreciative whistles. The power of the light was definitely brighter than usual. I'd never seen this room properly before. They rarely raised the lighting in this place above candle light level, using spot lights on the stage and keeping the rest of the room dark to hide the multitude of sins going on.

"Good evening gentlemen aaaand not so gentle men..."

There were shouts, whistles and loud laughter from the crowd. 

"You all know that once a month we have Open Pole Nights. Anyone who thinks they want to take a spin can come on down and strut their booty across my stage. They keep what they earn and you guys get a taste of virgin, or not so virgin as the case may be, dancer flesh... Well tonight I've got an extra special treat for you."

More shouting and hooting from the crowd. Looking across the booth I realised Roxy and Mindy didn't seem to be around yet. Thank fuck. Probably cleaning up after our time in the back room. My stomach churned again at the thought. I just had to get through one more drink then I could leave and it wouldn't seem strange. 

"Tonight I had a little someone wander through my doors. They weren't actually here for try outs. No. They were here for other reasons but with one look I just knew I needed them to give you boys a show. The sweetest little thing this side of the Brooklyn Bridge and I'm not sure you're ready for all that innocence wrapped up in white lace. Get your cash ready, you're going to need it." 

The shouting and foot stomping was deafening. 

"So without further ado, for the very first time on stage, let alone a stage with a stripper pole,  please welcome Snow White."

All the lights went out and the crowd went crazy. The first beats of a song started before a spotlight highlighted what appeared to be a man seated in a folding chair towards the rear of the stage. That was odd. I couldn't recall a time I'd seen a man on the stage. 

Maybe this guy was a stripper? He was certainly built, his bare chest on display was full of tattoos and muscles, his black dress pants sat low on his hips. I wasn't sure what kind of reception he'd get in this room and how did he fit the whole innocent Snow White vibe she'd just announced?

As the music progressed I realised it was Rocket by Beyonce and I recalled a memory of when I last heard this song. It was the same one Emily's class had chosen for their graduation project back in college. I could still picture her body moving to the sultry beat. Fuck! My beautiful Emily, what had I done. My stomach rolled.

Simon broke into my memory by loudly snapping my name, he'd obviously been talking to me from across the booth and I'd been zoned out. When I looked at him, he smiled his slimy smile and went to speak again but now my attention was fully on the woman making her way down to the front of the stage.

It couldn't be. No fucking way.

My Emily was on stage in a strip club.