A lifetime of hello's and too many goodbyes.

Part 21

Give the man a chance. Part 1 of 2

 Dyland asked me to meet him at the Top restaurant for lunch, when I got there, he's waiting at the bar, he said change of plans, he's flying up to ATL with EJ so we can only have a drink before he goes, I ordered water he had white wine.

He asked me about Manny, I said he's fine, Dyland kept looking over my shoulder, I turned around to see what he was looking at, it's Pierre. I told him don't start with me about that boy.

James, I'm not, I just noticed him sitting alone, EJ said he has lunch with Pierre once in a while, and he found out that Pierre was seeing some dude and found out he was married, he's hurting.

Dyland why are you telling me that boy's business, he said I should give him a chance, I said I knew it, he's trying to hook me up again with Pierre.

I told him besides I don't feel right being with Pierre just for sex, he said than be his friend no strings attached, he's sure Pierre really liked me, he even tried to move on with another guy, but they broke up. EJ's been trying to get Pierre to hang out with them, he just works and stays home, that's not Pierre he's kind of wild, so he must've been in love, I said love can hurt.

 I said if he just broke up with someone the last thing on his mind is sex, Dyland said no one mentioned sex, just friendship, he told me he has to get going, Dyland hugged me and left, I turned around and watched Pierre he looked like he just lost his best friend, maybe he did and he felt like that dude who fucked him over, was his friend as well as his lover.

 I got up and walked over to his table, he looked up at me, I asked him did he mind if I sat with him, he said why would I want to, I told him he looks like he could use someone to talk to, Pierre looked at me hard, and said I never been nice to him, why now.

Oh, let me guess, James, Dyland told you how a dude I trusted lied to me and broke it off, so you just wanted to let me know I'm a loser is that right.

 Pierre, I don't think you're a loser, and that dude must've really hurt you for you to think that way about yourself, if one thing I know about you, you are a strong dude. Someone told me after I lost my husband get over my pity party and move on, there's someone out there for all of us.

The thing is James, just like you know about my situation I know about yours, and you haven't moved on from Cecil, and  maybe it's not me, but you let a good man get away because you won't let go of the past, it's alright to keep Cecil in your heart, but he would want you to be happy, he said what does a punk kid like me really know about love, and losing someone special.

I told him, I do fucking know, I told him about losing my best friend, he said I probably fucked his dude or something, I said the something is I fucked his father, and I was in love with him, only he used me for sex, and my friend found out about us, and we fell out. So, I do know how it feels to love someone, he may not have died, but I still loved him, even if he didn't love me the way I wanted to be loved. I said I have to get back to work, I got up and told James to have a nice day and left.

Wow, that kid is really hurting, I kind of felt sorry for him, but who does he think he is talking to me like that, he still doesn't know how I feel, I looked up and Cecil is standing there shaking his head, I said not now, the waiter said he can come back, I just got up and left.

I went downstairs and talked to Reese about what's going on with me and seeing Cecil, he said maybe I should talk to someone professionally that can help me better than he can, he's never lost someone special the way I did, sorry that's all he can tell me. I did ask him about Pierre, he said his nephew has changed so much, he's here first thing in the morning and the last to leave, it looks like he's finally got his shit together.